It's your own fault!
Your wound may not be your fault, but the healing is clearly your responsibility. Everyone is responsible for his own life; he shapes his future by his thoughts, words and actions.
This concept enables the conscious building of impressions that lead to happiness, avoid future suffering.
According to the historical Buddha, at the beginning there is always thinking as the cause of resolutions, which then lead to speech and actions. So far, so good.
But are we always aware of this fact?
I think not! Do you know the story of the Roman slave Epictetus?
After a difficult and eventful history, this learned man founded a school of philosophy. Thus, in his teachings, he separated the states into two categories, those that are beyond human power (given things) and those that are within the sphere of influence of everyone (can be determined by oneself).
From him comes the sentence: "The way to happiness consists in not worrying about anything that is beyond the influence of our will".
In every life there are good and bad events, sorrow and worry are human, but we must heal ourselves, "come back to ourselves", not fall into depression and self-doubt.
We are responsible for this, the suffering we go through is our responsibility, and the healing from this pain is also our responsibility. And about the things that come from outside, we should not even think about them, because that leads to nothing. Problems, conflicts, burdens, insecurity, obstacles, anger, distress, inadequacies, every obstacle that lies within our sphere of influence, these things we can control and, if we want, stop, simply by "standing above" them.
The philosophy of Buddha goes far beyond the teachings of Epictetus, according to the great teacher we should not worry at all, not evaluate things and people, not even ourselves and our lives.
For starters, it already brings great benefits to us at least not to worry about the things that are clearly beyond our control. "I hope it won't rain tomorrow", such considerations will not bring us any further.
Anyway, we are to blame for everything ourselves, we are liable for our thoughts, our words and actions, and we have to heal ourselves.
I would like to conclude with some sentences of Epictetus:
"But the wise man finds no one guilty, neither himself nor others".
"It is not the things themselves that trouble us, but the ideas and opinions of the things"
"It is not things that are positive or negative, but our attitude that makes them so"
"Endure and renounce!"
Never say of a thing, "I have lost it," but say, "I have given it back." Your child died? No, you gave it back. Your wife died? No, you have returned it. "I have lost my property". Good, you returned that too. "But he is a criminal who stole it from me". What is it to you, through whom the one who once gave it to you reclaimed it from you?
That which comes out of man makes man unclean; for from within, out of the heart of man, come forth evil thoughts, fornication, theft, murder, adultery, covetousness, malice, guile, dissipation, ill will, blasphemy, pride, unreasonableness
- Bible –
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