49. Tired of yelling? 5 R's of Positive Parenting

Tired of yelling?  When you try to do all the things and wear all the hats we can see “Medusa Mama” surface.    Who is Medusa Mama? It’s when you ask something of your kids, or anyone really, and then after not feeling heard she yells.  Yes picture snakes from the head and maybe even your head spins, eyes turn into lasers and all the things.  Ha!  Ok.. maybe it’s mostly the yelling and then you feel bad and it’s just a cycle that isn’t pleasant for anyone involved.     What is positive parenting? Positive parenting is based on the thought that kids are inherently good and so they want to do the right thing, but may need to be guided that way.  It’s about teaching without breaking their spirit and with understanding the logic behind the undesired behaviors and really looking at the way we parent that enables the kids to still feel loved and powerful.    What are the benefits of Positive Parenting?   Positive Parenting builds self esteem, autonomy, mutual respect and doesn’t result in anyone acting in emotion in the moment and feeling bad later.  I believe it helps you to be thinking about the outcome that you want rather than having dominance or power.  This can help you to stop yelling and joining their chaos, but rather bringing them to peace. The 5 R’s of Positive Parenting I heard these from Parenting Solutions on instagram, check out their page here.    1.) Be Respectful- Take away the blame, shame or pain when you are parenting.  Make sure the consequence is fair.   3 core rules of the responsive approach are listed here. Want more on this? Check out this website.    Respect yourself Respect others Respect your environment (surroundings) Have young kids? Exchange the word respect for "taking care of" and they will begin to understand.    2.) Be Related- Is the consequence related to the behavior?  This will communicate a logical consequence that   3.) Reasonable in duration- Are you being fair?  Working in extremes can result in a child giving up trying because it’s just over the top.  For instance, they don’t do their chores for one day so they are grounded for a month versus they don’t do their chores one day and lost a related privilege for that day.    4.) Revealed in advance-  Do the kids know what the consequence is beforehand?    5.) Repeat it back to them- Set the expectations out to them, have them repeat it so you know they understand it and the consequence before hand and then follow through on it.  Seems simple right?  This foresight allows managing it to be easier and usually ends up in less backlash when a consequence is released.      If your kids are acting out they may be needing more attention or power.  This search for autonomy or choice in what happens in the world around them or feel seen may be the cause of some acting out.   As work from home moms doing all the things, we may need to take a breath and analyze the reason for the behavior and be a little strategic in making changes in the behavior that is effective.    Do you like more episodes like this?  Do you need to put some strategy around managing things in your daily life that need work outside of your business?  Shoot me a voice DM on instagram or screenshot and share this episode on your stories or facebook.  We can get through this one day at a time, together.   Come over to Multipassionate Mompreneur and get the support that you need to get into action.  Let’s Connect! Learn–> www.angelmcelhaney.com Connect –> info@angelmcelhaney.com Join the Sisterhood —>Multipassionate Mompreneur FB community Work with Angel–> FB GROUP CONNECTION PLAN