371: GuyTalk: What's it like doing in-person men's work?

371: GuyTalk: What's it like doing in-person men's work?

Author: Melanie Curtin July 25, 2025 Duration: 1:19:46

“Every one of us walking onto that property was nervous.”

So says one man on this episode, describing his experiencing attending his first in-person men's retreat.

If you've ever felt intimidated or unsure about doing in-person work with other men, you're far from alone. In the words of one man on this panel, “There’s a shared understanding of the brutality between men.”

But it doesn't have to stay that way. There can be a kind and loving experience of brotherhood.

---

Come to the retreat!

It's August 8th - September 1st in Northern California (about 2 hours north of San Francisco). We work hard to keep it financially accessible, and payment plans are available.

As one man put it in this episode, “If you’re thinking about going, you’re already there.”

https://evolutionary.men/retreat/

---

Work with us

Want to go deeper than the podcast? Jason and I are ready to work with you! We specialize in helping men break old patterns and transform their sex & love lives for good.

To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)

---

Memorable quotes from this episode:

  • “I never felt like other boys.”
  • "I wanted to be vulnerable and open, but I didn’t know how, and I wasn’t sure I could.”
  • “I was nervous as hell.”
  • “We lived on cheesy jokes and greasy burgers.”
  • “I was deathly afraid to become a terrible father.”
  • “I cried tears of joy for the first time in my life.”
  • “I realized — through all the work I’ve been doing, therapy, self-reflection, etc. — how much love I have for myself (finally).”
  • “I went into a panic because I’m having flashbacks of summer camp.”
  • “If we’re gonna talk about this trauma, we might as well do it in the hot tub!”
  • “There was racism even within my own church.”
  • “When I was a boy, there was never any spiritual or deep, emotional holding by men in my life.”
  • “Part of going to the retreat was to build my nervous system into more resilience.”
  • “We’re going to be there no matter what.”
  • “I can accept other men’s unconditional love, and it helped me know how to provide unconditional love to other men.”
  • “I used to use my intellect to defend myself or talk my way out of things.”
  • “I came into the first retreat a very tough nut to crack.”
  • “There’s now a level of connection now with my wife that I can’t even describe.”
  • “The dynamic within my whole family has changed.”
  • “There is hope with change.”
  • “You’ll make friends.”
  • “Come for the food; stay for the healing.”
  • “You WILL experience a transformation.”
  • “This is where you get your master’s degree in men’s work.”
  • “Just get there.”

Melanie Curtin hosts Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women, a space where curiosity meets practical change. This isn't about memorizing pick-up lines or playing games; it's built on the idea that genuine personal growth is the most attractive quality a man can develop. The conversations here move beyond surface-level tips to explore the deeper dynamics of connection, drawing from insights across health, culture, and psychology. You'll hear from women who offer a candid look into what fosters real attraction and lasting partnership, providing a valuable perspective often missing from mainstream advice. Each episode tackles the honest questions and challenges men face, whether navigating early dating, deepening intimacy, or building a resilient marriage. The focus is always on actionable understanding-how to listen, communicate, and show up in ways that are both authentic and effective. Tune in for a podcast that respects your intelligence and meets you where you are, offering a blend of straightforward talk and nuanced discussion that can reshape how you approach every aspect of your life with women. It's for any man ready to move past confusion and toward more meaningful, fulfilling connections.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women
Podcast Episodes
368: Can a live retreat change everything? (ft. Jason Lange) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 55:08
When Jason was in his mid-20s, he was stuck. He numbed out with porn much of the time, had never had sex, and struggled with dating and love relationship.Even outside of dating, it felt like something was missing in his…
366: Love can, in fact, be calculated. (ft. Zoey Charif) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:00:05
Have you ever wished you could scientifically determine what’s wrong in your relationship? Or felt it would be helpful to somehow mathematically see how compatible you are with someone you’re dating? Or gone through a di…
362: From skeptic to believer (ft. Naushad Godrej) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:24:06
Have you ever doubted? Whether you've doubted yourself, the existence of a higher power, the efficacy of "alternative" healing techniques, or anything that goes against the mainstream -- this has likely come up for you a…
361: Worried about being a late bloomer? (ft. Jason Lange) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:11:26
Are you concerned about your lack of experience, whether that's sexually, in a dating context, or time in long-term relationships? Maybe you feel behind in some way, and hesitant or fearful about telling a woman about yo…
360: GirlTalk: Striking while the iron is hot! [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:32:22
Want to be even sexier to women than you are now? ;) Learn to strike while the iron is hot!Seriously though -- striking while the iron is hot makes you a man who can generate polarity, build trust, and have women want to…
359: GuyTalk: Ever felt stuck? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:44:27
Have you ever just felt STUCK? Stuck in your dating life, stuck in your marriage, stuck in your sex life (or stuck in your sex life within your marriage)? As one man on our panel put it, "I felt stuck for most of the 20…