The Hidden Cost of Seeming Calm – Dilpreet Buxi on ADHD and Masking | Ep 129

The Hidden Cost of Seeming Calm – Dilpreet Buxi on ADHD and Masking | Ep 129

Author: Jeremy Nagel January 26, 2026 Duration: 36:02

Calm on the outside. Spiraling on the inside.

Dilpreet Buxi shares what it was like to grow up masking anxiety, living with a constantly racing mind, and slowly realizing his nervous system works differently.

If you struggle with chronic stress, masking, emotional dysregulation, or feeling “fine” while everything feels too much inside, this episode explores why stress begins in the body, how autistic and ADHD nervous systems process stress differently, and what actually helps.

Dilpreet Buxi is the CEO and Co-founder of Philia Labs, a Melbourne-based company using wearable technology and biomedical engineering to make stress measurable and manageable. With a PhD in Electrical Engineering from Monash University, his work focuses on supporting autistic people, people with anxiety, and their caregivers through objective stress measurement and early intervention.

Episode Highlights:

00:03:05 — Masking anxiety behind calm
He describes learning to appear calm while feeling deeply stressed inside. The disconnect between outer presentation and inner reality shaped how he understood himself.

00:07:27 — Realizing he may be neurodivergent
After pivoting his company toward supporting autistic people, he began recognizing the same patterns in his own life. Reading about nervous system differences forced uncomfortable self-reflection.

00:13:00 — Choosing to pivot or shut down
After hearing caregiver stories, the team faced a choice: pivot or wind down the company. The decision became personal when his co-founder connected the mission to his autistic brother.

00:19:00 — Acute vs chronic stress
He explains the difference between moment-to-moment stress and stress that reshapes the body over months. Chronic stress quietly drives fatigue, sleep problems, and emotional dysregulation.

00:24:16 — You can’t outthink stress
Stress regulation starts in the body, not the mind. Movement, breathing, and vagus-nerve-stimulating practices matter more than positive thinking.

00:32:23 — Winding down for real sleep
Evening yoga, meditation, gratitude, and keeping the phone out of reach help his nervous system switch into rest mode. Better sleep becomes the foundation for everything else.

Connect with Dilpreet:
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dilpreet-buxi/
Website: https://solutions.philialabs.com.au/


Connect with Jeremy:

LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/nageljeremy

Email: jeremy@focusbear.io


More from Focus Bear:

Website: https://focusbear.io

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/focus-bear/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@focusbearapp

Twitter: https://twitter.com/focusbear1

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/focus_bear/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/focusbearapp/

Podcast: https://podcast.focusbear.io

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@focusbear


Finding a rhythm that works for your unique brain can feel like an endless puzzle. Focus and Chill-productivity tactics for AuDHDers and other neurodivergent folks is a space where that puzzle gets pieced together through real, lived experience. Host Jeremy Nagel steers conversations away from generic, one-size-fits-all advice, diving instead into the practical systems and compassionate tactics that actually stick for neurodivergent minds. Each episode features guests who aren't just experts by profession but by life-people navigating AuDHD and other neurotypes who have forged their own reliable paths through the chaos of daily tasks and big ambitions. You’ll hear honest breakdowns of what works, what fails spectacularly, and how to build a sustainable sense of accomplishment without the burnout. This podcast lives in the intersection of Education, Fitness, Health, and Mental Self-Improvement, recognizing that true productivity is holistic. It’s about managing energy, not just time; it’s about creating habits that bend and flex with you. Tune in for a blend of strategic insights and empathetic support, all designed to help you craft a more focused and chill life. The podcast is sponsored by FocusBear, a tool built with these very principles in mind.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

Focus and Chill - productivity tactics for AuDHDers and other neurodivergent folks
Podcast Episodes
Episode 103: Yenn Purkis [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 34:47
Welcome to episode #103! We’re thrilled to be joined by Yenn Purkis today.Yenn Purkis is an autistic, asexual, and non-binary advocate, author, and speaker with a diagnosis of schizophrenia. They’ve written 18 published…
Episode 67: Dr. Megan Anna Neif [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 33:38
Welcome to episode #67 We’re thrilled to be joined by Dr. Megan Anna Neff today. Dr. Neff is a neurodivergent Psychologist and founder of Neurodivergent Insights where she creates education and wellness resources for neu…
Episode 102: Dr. Amanda Mullin [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 35:13
Welcome to episode #102! We’re thrilled to be joined by Dr. Amanda Mullen today.Dr. Amanda Mullen is a clinical psychologist, business owner, and keynote speaker passionate about helping people thrive using neurodivergen…
Episode 101: Sharon Collon [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 44:40
Welcome to Episode 101! We’re thrilled to be joined by Sharon Collon, ADHD coach, parenting expert, and founder of The Functional Family. Sharon shares her journey of creating practical ADHD strategies for individuals an…
Episode 100: Joey and Jeremy [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 34:09
Welcome to Episode 100!This special milestone episode is a no-guest conversation between your hosts Joey and Jeremy. After 100 episodes, they reflect on lessons learned about productivity, focus, neurodivergence, energy…
Episode 99: Annie Crowe [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 46:38
Welcome to Episode 99!We’re thrilled to have Annie Crow—an autistic & ADHD human rights lawyer, founder of the Neuro Access Network, and keynote speaker on neurodiversity advocacy—join us today. In this episode, Annie sh…
Episode 98: Rob Edwards [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 44:06
Welcome to episode number 98 of the Focus and Chill podcast.We’re thrilled to be joined by Rob Edwards today. Rob is the CEO of the NEA—the Neurodiversity and Entrepreneurship Association. The NEA provides a meeting plac…
Ep. 97 Pip Scott-Allen [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 43:44
Welcome to episode 97 of the Focus and Chill podcast! Today’s guest is the energetic and insightful Pip Scott‑Allen, originally from Canada and now making waves in Australia.Pip’s journey into leadership and team culture…
Episode 96: April Lea [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 45:08
Welcome to episode number 96 of the Focus Chill podcast. We’re thrilled to be joined by April Lea today. April is an ADHD founder with a background in product management and software engineering. She's passionate about r…