TPP 305a: Stuart Shanker on What Self-Regulation Is, Why It Matters, and How to Help Our Children (and Ourselves) Do It Better

TPP 305a: Stuart Shanker on What Self-Regulation Is, Why It Matters, and How to Help Our Children (and Ourselves) Do It Better

Author: Debbie Reber July 3, 2026 Duration: 44:32
We are kicking off this season with a conversation with Dr. Stuart Shanker, who I first learned about through my friend Seth Perler as he’s been part of the TEFOS Summit. I love Stuart's message and recently devoured his book Self-Reg: How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage With Life, and wanted to dive deeper with Stuart about it. In this episode, we get into the ways in which the brain controls the levels of stress, the difference between self-regulation and self-control, and the difference between stress behavior and misbehaving. Stuart also walks us through his 5 steps to Self-Reg, and talks about the power of us as parents and caregivers and educators doing our own self-reg work so we can support the kids around us. Things you'll learn from this episode * How the explosion of stress-related problems in recent years among children has augmented the need for additional self-reg resources for parents and educators * How the brain controls the levels of stress and simple strategies that can be used to calm the nervous system response * Why self-reg practices for parents and teachers other adults begin with learning how to regulate ourselves * The difference between misbehavior and stress behavior * How self-regulation mechanisms evolve as we get older * The distinction between self-control and self-regulation and the five steps to self-regulation Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children is a space for parents who are moving at the speed their kids require. Hosted by Debbie Reber, an author and activist who understands the terrain, this podcast offers more than just advice-it offers a sense of shared experience. Each episode delves into the real-world challenges and joys of raising children with ADHD, autism, learning disabilities, Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), giftedness, or twice-exceptional (2e) profiles. You’ll hear from specialists, educators, and therapists who provide actionable strategies, but the core of the conversation is always connection. Debbie guides discussions that move beyond theory to address the daily realities: managing meltdowns, advocating within school systems, nurturing a child’s unique strengths, and preserving your own well-being in the process. It’s a resource for those moments when standard parenting approaches fall short, offering insights that are both practical and deeply empathetic. Listening to this podcast feels like a conversation with a knowledgeable friend who gets it, one that leaves you with tangible ideas and the reassurance that you’re not navigating this path alone. The focus is on building a supportive framework for your family, one episode at a time.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children
Podcast Episodes
TPP 266a: A Conversation with Poet and Advocate LeDerick Horne [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 40:28
Performance poet and advocate LeDerick Horne talks about his journey with a hidden disability, his advocacy work, and how he found his love for poetry. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
TPP 522: A Whole Child Approach to ADHD with Phil Boucher, M.D. [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 45:51
Today I’m talking with Dr. Phil Boucher, a board-certified pediatrician who’s particularly interested in helping families understand and support kids with ADHD and help parents better understand their child, trust their…
TPP 521: A Conversation with Dr. Peter Gray About Restoring Childhood [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 46:48
I’m talking with developmental psychologist Dr. Peter Gray about his new book, Restoring Childhood: How to Set Kids Free in the Age of Anxiety, which challenges one of the dominant narratives about the youth mental healt…
TPP 253a: Advocate and Author Jonathan Mooney on Why Normal Sucks [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 43:45
I’m excited to share this powerful and gut-punching conversation with Jonathan Mooney, a self-described “do-gooder,” speaker, and writer who didn’t learn to read until he was 12-years-old. Growing up with Dyslexia, Jonat…
TPP 519: Brendan Mahan on Overcoming the Wall of Awful [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 43:16
What if the reason you or your child can’t “just do the thing” is not laziness, but a Wall of Awful built from repeated frustration, shame, anxiety, and failure? Brendan Mahan breaks down the hidden emotional barrier beh…
TPP 518: Good Sleeping for Neurodivergent Kids, with Dr. Melisa Moore [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 41:12
​Today we’re talking about the complex and often misunderstood sleep challenges that show up in neurodivergent kids with Dr. Melisa Moore, a clinical psychologist who is board-certified in behavioral sleep medicine and h…