How Do I Stop Being Such A People Pleaser?

How Do I Stop Being Such A People Pleaser?

Author: Sony Music Entertainment / Jonathan Van Ness January 29, 2025 Duration: 51:15
JVN sits down with Kati Morton, a licensed therapist and bestselling author, to dive deep into the world of people-pleasing. Together, they unpack why people-pleasing isn’t just about being nice—it’s about discomfort with other people’s discomfort, and why it leaves so many of us feeling invisible, drained, and resentful. Kati shares her expert tips on breaking free from the cycle, including practical strategies like “opposite action” and learning to set boundaries without guilt. They discuss why saying no doesn’t make you selfish, how to rediscover yourself when you’ve been lost in pleasing others, and why finding the courage to be disliked might be the most radical act of self-care. Kati Morton, LMFT, is a licensed marriage and family therapist and a highly sought-after public speaker in the field of mental health. Starting with a Master's degree in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University, she has built a vast & vibrant online community.  Her YouTube channel - with over 1.4 million subscribers and 130 million views, has made her a prominent figure in translating complex mental health concepts into accessible language. Through her dynamic presence on social media and appearances on top-rated shows such as The TODAY Show, Dr. Phil, Alex Cooper’s Call Her Daddy, E! News, CBS The Doctors, and The Dr. Drew Show, Kati successfully spreads awareness, reduces stigma, and empowers individuals to prioritize their mental well-being. As an accomplished author of two best-selling books "Are u ok?: A Guide to Caring for Your Mental Health," and “Traumatized: Identify, Understand and Cope with PTSD and Emotional Stress”, Kati's dedication to dismantling barriers to mental health services and fostering a supportive global community is unmatched. You can find Kati on Instagram and Tiktok @katimorton and on YouTube @KatiMorton Follow us on Instagram @CuriousWithJVN to join the conversation. Jonathan is on Instagram @JVN. Transcripts for each episode are available at JonathanVanNess.com. Find books from Getting Curious guests at bookshop.org/shop/curiouswithjvn. Our senior producer is Chris McClure. Our editor & engineer is Nathanael McClure. Production support from Julie Carrillo, Anne Currie, and Chad Hall. Our theme music is “Freak” by QUIÑ; for more, head to TheQuinCat.com. Curious about bringing your brand to life on the show? Email podcastadsales@sonymusic.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You know that feeling when you’re just trying to figure it all out, and you need a guide who’s equal parts insightful and hilarious? That’s the space where Getting Better with Jonathan Van Ness lives. Hosted by the beloved Jonathan Van Ness of Queer Eye, this podcast turns genuine curiosity into a powerful engine for personal growth. Each episode feels like a vibrant conversation with a deeply empathetic friend who isn’t afraid to ask the big, awkward, or wonderfully silly questions. Jonathan sits down with a diverse array of experts, authors, and thinkers, weaving together discussions that are as enlightening as they are unexpectedly funny. The result is a unique blend of education, comedy, and culture that tackles everything from societal issues to the intimate details of self-improvement. You’ll find yourself laughing one moment and having a profound revelation the next, all while feeling less alone in the challenges of modern life. This isn’t about quick fixes; it’s about the ongoing, messy, and beautiful process of understanding ourselves and the world. Produced in partnership with Sony Music Entertainment, the podcast delivers consistently engaging audio experiences that are both a lifeline and a joy. Tune in for a weekly dose of warmth, wit, and the kind of conversations that leave you feeling genuinely better equipped to navigate your own path.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Getting Better with Jonathan Van Ness
Podcast Episodes
THE MONDAY EDIT: Trump pardons, Ron Vara, White Lotus Finale [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 34:34
This week, we’re talking: travel fatigue, negative self talk, the price of Presidential pardons, Ron Vara, and the end of music’s longest feud. Plus! Our breakdown of The White Lotus finale. Follow us on Instagram @getti…
3 Procrastination Hacks To Jumpstart Your Day with Marie Forleo [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 49:36
Procrastination, honey! We’ve all been there, done that, and bought the t-shirt. But whether it’s fear or misalignment - we’re uncovering the real reasons why we procrastinate, how to handle the procrastinator in your li…
Want to Love Better? Start Here with Yung Pueblo [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 52:39
We’re diving into the world of love, self-awareness, and the power of releasing the old labels that no longer serve us. JVN is joined by the wise and wonderful Yung Pueblo (aka Diego Perez) to talk about how we can all l…
The Life Changing Science of Optimism (And How You Can Harness It) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 48:23
Getting Curious just got a Queer Eye makeover all its own! Today we’re entering a new era of the podcast - Getting Better! We’re so excited you’re joining us on this next chapter. This podcast will help guide you through…