Why Your Brain Craves Revenge and How to Break Free

Why Your Brain Craves Revenge and How to Break Free

Author: Sony Music Entertainment / Jonathan Van Ness May 21, 2025 Duration: 49:00
Revenge, why do we want to get revenge so bad? And where does that urge come from? And how do we go from wanting to get revenge to being able to forgive someone or others? James Kimmel Jr., Yale lecturer and co-founder of the Yale Collaborative for Motive Studies, is on Getting Better this week to teach us just that. James gives us insight into the psychology of these complex emotions, the parts of the brain affected, and what research, studies and science shows us about forgiveness. James Kimmel, Jr., JD, is a lecturer in psychiatry at the Yale School of Medicine, the founder and co-director of the Yale Collaborative for Motive Control Studies, and a researcher, lawyer, and novelist who focuses on neuroscience, psychology, revenge, addiction, forgiveness, and violence. A breakthrough scholar and expert on revenge and forgiveness, he first identified compulsive revenge seeking as an addiction and first developed the behavioral addiction model of revenge and the brain disease model of revenge addiction as public health approaches for preventing and treating violence. More can be found on his personal website, www.jameskimmeljr.com. Full Video Episodes now available on YouTube. Not A Phase. Trans Lifeline Follow us on Instagram @gettingbetterwithjvn Jonathan on Instagram @jvn Senior Producer, Chris McClure Producer, Editor & Engineer is Nathanael McClure Production support from Julie Carrillo, Anne Currie, and Chad Hall Our theme music is also composed by Nathanael McClure. Curious about bringing your brand to life on the show? Email podcastadsales@sonymusic.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You know that feeling when you’re just trying to figure it all out, and you need a guide who’s equal parts insightful and hilarious? That’s the space where Getting Better with Jonathan Van Ness lives. Hosted by the beloved Jonathan Van Ness of Queer Eye, this podcast turns genuine curiosity into a powerful engine for personal growth. Each episode feels like a vibrant conversation with a deeply empathetic friend who isn’t afraid to ask the big, awkward, or wonderfully silly questions. Jonathan sits down with a diverse array of experts, authors, and thinkers, weaving together discussions that are as enlightening as they are unexpectedly funny. The result is a unique blend of education, comedy, and culture that tackles everything from societal issues to the intimate details of self-improvement. You’ll find yourself laughing one moment and having a profound revelation the next, all while feeling less alone in the challenges of modern life. This isn’t about quick fixes; it’s about the ongoing, messy, and beautiful process of understanding ourselves and the world. Produced in partnership with Sony Music Entertainment, the podcast delivers consistently engaging audio experiences that are both a lifeline and a joy. Tune in for a weekly dose of warmth, wit, and the kind of conversations that leave you feeling genuinely better equipped to navigate your own path.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Getting Better with Jonathan Van Ness
Podcast Episodes
What Nature Can Teach Us About Healing - with Dr. Beronda Montgomery [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 49:03
Happy Earth Day! This week on Getting Better, Jonathan sits down with plant biologist, author, and educator Dr. Beronda Montgomery for a grounding conversation about nature’s healing power and America’s Black botanical l…
Spelling Bee Mix-Tape: Nouns, Verbs, and Adjectives [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 29:50
This week: we’ve compiled our favorite Monday Edit Spelling Bee’s for your listening pleasure! Regularly scheduled TME’s will be back next Monday - but don’t forget to tune in this Wednesday, April 15th for a brand new e…
Conversion Therapy Nearly Killed Me - with Timothy Schraeder Rodriguez [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 38:45
Conversion therapy is back in the headlines—and it may be closer to home than you think. Today, we’re unpacking the reality of conversion therapy: what it teaches, how it operates, and the lasting impact it can have on i…
GLP-1s: Staying On, Coming Off, & What to Expect [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 45:53
GLP-1... 4-LIFE? JVN is joined by Dr. Liz Kazarian for a candid conversation on GLP-1 medications, the future of obesity care, and JVN’s personal journey with the medication. They cover: Food tracking—helpful or harmful?…
Excellence v. Perfection, GLP-1 Spelling Bee, JVN’s Memory Hack [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 29:25
This week: we’re talking about CATS: The Jellicle Ball, weddings, maiden name lore, striving for excellence (not perfection), GLP-1 Spelling Bee, Alexia Moore’s arrest, sleep for memory, the North Atlantic current, and B…
Dylan Mulvaney | Turning Your Worst Days Into Your Greatest Strength [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 46:06
Show them you can THRIVE. Hey Better Babes! It’s my birthday week, and I’m sitting down with my of my BEST friends in the whole wide world - Dylan Mulvaney! Dylan opens up about thriving under pressure, Broadway’s SIX, a…
Afroman, Broadway Spelling Bee, Wisconsin Beagle Rescue Mission [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 29:53
This week, we’re talking: JVN’s birthday, Inner Child Work, weekend milestones, hack-a-rella sickness, what WE’RE getting better at this week, Afroman on TikTok, Broadway-Themed Spelling Bee, covering up hickeys, Alexand…