What The Future Holds

What The Future Holds

Author: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella & Studio71 & Confetti Cannon May 20, 2026 Duration: 1:08:45
This week, we're looking into the future for a greater understanding of Andrew's future husband: Carmine. Amplify your Sapphic Pride event - Shoot your shot⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠!  Join us on Patreon! No filter. No notes. No pants (optional). New episodes drop Thursdays at 8PM EST: https://www.patreon.com/goodchildrenpod HOSTS: Joe Hegyes & Andrew Muscarella EDITOR: Kenzie Edmondson LISTEN: https://linktr.ee/goodchildren FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/goodchildrenpod instagram.com/joehegyes instagram.com/andrewmuscarella FOLLOW US ON TIKTOK: tiktok.com/goodchildrenpod tiktok.com/andrewmusky tiktok.com/bequietjoe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Good Children is a comedy podcast hosted by childhood best friends Joe Hegyes and Andrew Muscarella. It’s a conversation born from a shared past of trying to be perfect, of chasing approval and gold stars, and now navigating the weird, often hilarious fallout of that upbringing. Each episode feels like pulling up a chair between two friends who are finally letting their guard down, unpacking the anxieties and performative habits that stick around long after the report cards are gone. They talk about the mundane pressures of adult life-the instinct to suck in your stomach, both literally and metaphorically-with a warmth and humor that comes from decades of knowing each other’s secrets. This isn’t a lecture on self-improvement; it’s a weekly, laugh-filled excavation of what it means to have been a “good” kid and the messy, ongoing work of figuring out who you are after that. Produced in collaboration with Studio71 and Confetti Cannon, the podcast finds comedy in the relatable tension between who we were raised to be and the people we actually are, one candid, meandering conversation at a time.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Good Children
Podcast Episodes
How It Feels to Fall for a Boy for the First Time [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:10:59
Did someone order an episode of Love, Victor? This week, we’re talking our first gay romances. Joe met a boy at the Met and spent the summer in museum corners, on crowded trains, on dates that felt like a movie. Andrew k…
Going to Poundtown at the Beach [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:11:39
Good Children: The Podcast is known for its fearless, unflinching commitment to investigative journalism. This week, we take on the most urgent question of our time: why does summer in New York City make us so h*rny, swe…
Sitting, Scooping, and Sucking: Bathroom Politics [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:04:41
Good Children: The Podcast continues its brave, Pulitzer-adjacent coverage of the issues that matter. This week, we investigate the modern bathroom: a space for releasing, for sucking, for crying, and wondering when you'…
Bagels: A Definitive Ranking [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:10:52
Good Children: The Podcast prides itself on award-winning journalism that isn't afraid to ask the hard-hitting questions that might make other comedian podcast duos uncomfortable. This week, we're tackling our toughest s…
Early Signs of Daddy Puberty [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:04:11
This week, we’re talking Daddy Puberty: the slow, confusing transformation from boy to twink to… Daddy. Is it a mindset? A muscle mass threshold? A beard-to-hair ratio? We break down the biology, the psychology, and the…
Escaping The Fire Island Hookup Forest [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:17:06
This week, we embed ourselves deep inside the myth, the legend, the cautionary tale that is Fire Island. Our mission? To uncover the truth behind the infamous Belvedere Hotel, an all-nude, men-only boarding house perched…
From The Archive: Bear in the Woods (S4E7) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:30:22
Thank you for your patience as we plan our next season, we'll be back shortly with brand new episodes starting in July! (Happy Pride Month, am I right?) Until then, join us for a weekend in nature that changed our lives…
From The Archive: Chimes and Punishment (S4E10) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:18:21
Did you know acapella groups participate in violent hazing rituals? This week we're taking it back to last summer, when Andrew revealed the traumatic story behind his barefooted days as a Loyola Chime. P.S.: We're taking…
From The Archive: HOW TO PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE (S2E1) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:24:31
Throwing it back to when we tried to be an educational podcast: "Let's learn to put ourselves out there together: from using the internet to gain notoriety as a middle schooler, to dealing with bullying and humiliation i…