Am I queer? - Coaching session with Caitlin

Am I queer? - Coaching session with Caitlin

Author: Leah Carey February 25, 2021 Duration: 45:46

Leah shares a coaching session with client Caitlin to give us an in-depth experience of what coaching looks and feels like. Caitlin is divorced and currently in a friends-with-benefits heterosexual relationship. She and Leah had discussed fantasies and BDSM in previous private sessions; here they focus on Caitlin's new (or perhaps not new?) sexual attraction to women, and how she might begin to explore that in real life.

 

  • Leah explains what coaching does—and doesn't—involve. She introduces Caitlin, the coach-ee!
  • Caitlin catches Leah up on a big realization she's had since their last coaching sessions: she's sexually curious about women too.
  • Leah helps Caitlin hone in on whether her attraction to women is a leftover effect of our hyper-sexualized-female-form-loving culture, or a deeper sexual attraction.
  • The conversation turns to fantasies; they're a great way to safely explore new thoughts and desires. Erotica is another.
  • What "pansexual" means.
  • Dating women can feel new to women. Leah assures Caitlin that the rules are basically the same: "Don't be an asshole." Also, exploring sex with a new-to-you gender can feel like a second puberty.
  • When navigating COVID risks with dating apps, be clear up front about your risk tolerance and boundaries.
  • There are some sensitivities to know about for women who are new to dating women. Leah talks about bi vs lesbian. Also, there's a difference between sexual attraction and romantic attraction.
  • Threesomes can be a fun way to try sex with a woman, if approached with sensitivity. Leah recommends more resources.
  • They talk about how to find someone who wants to explore with you on the dating apps.
  • Leah talks more about what coaching looks and feels like, in solo and group options.

 

Resources mentioned:

  • Erotica collections – I recommend the collections edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel
  • Literotica – A site featuring erotica submitted by primarily amateur writers. I love it because no matter what your interest or fetish is, someone is writing about it here.  Because it's all amateur, though, you may have to wade through a bunch of stories that are terribly written before you hit on one that tickles your fancy!  Start by searching the tags for topics that interest you - https://tags.literotica.com (be aware that this site does show ads from porn sites so it is NSFW, but the pictures are generally not X-rated)

 

Update: 
Since this episode was released, the podcast has concluded. Here's how you can find me now:

 

EPISODE CREDITS:

Host / Producer – Leah Carey (email)
Audio Editor – Gretchen Kilby
Administrative Support - Lara O'Connor, Maria Franco

Transcript creation – Jan Acielo
Music – Nazar Rybak

 


Leah Carey's Good Girls Talk About Sex is built on a simple, powerful premise: honest, unfiltered conversation. As a Sex and Intimacy Coach, Leah guides discussions that feel less like interviews and more like the kind of intimate, revealing talk you'd share with a close friend. Each episode features women from an incredibly wide spectrum of life-differing in size, shape, age, orientation, and cultural or religious background. The stories include those from people raised as girls and transgender women, exploring a full range of relationship structures and levels of kink. What you'll hear are personal narratives about sexuality that are often left unspoken, shared without judgment. This podcast moves beyond theory into the lived, human experience, creating a rare space where complexity is welcomed and authenticity is the only rule. Tuning in means listening to voices that are frequently marginalized, finding common ground in unexpected places, and perhaps understanding your own story a little better through the generous sharing of others.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Good Girls Talk About Sex
Podcast Episodes
I married my platonic soulmate - Deidre [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:19:13
The road to reclaiming consent is extra-long when it begins at age 3, and even more complicated by undiagnosed mental health disorders. For Deidre, a lifetime of sexual assault and a growing substance problem led to a ro…
I think if I wait until marriage it won't hurt - Kyndra [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:08:02
What do you call a virgin who loves getting head? A comedian! Kyndra Crump takes a deep dive into heteroflexibility and gets some re-education about why losing your virginity doesn't have to hurt—especially if you alread…
Ask the physician : Menopause and hormones [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 55:23
Is it true that sex will become less fun - or even painful 😬 - after menopause? Is there any way to stop the changes that happen to our bodies as we get older? Today I have a special guest: MY OWN health care provider! S…
I was terrified to be visibly queer - Stevie [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:20:30
Sex is hard enough to figure out without also having to wrangle with your gender. Stevie was raised as a little girl, but that never quite fit. They've covered a lot of ground to find clarity. They're now happily married…
I kiss girls when I'm drunk - Mia [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:20:56
When culture tells you that women are sexy, but the church says same-sex attraction isn't allowed, you might try to screw yourself straight. Mia shares how she went from stealing kisses with girls thanks to alcohol-fuele…
I was kissing a vagina - Olivia [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:08:29
Growing up in a conservative church, some kids don't even know being gay is an option. Add that to an ill-kept family secret, and Olivia became scared to orgasm as an adult. She shares how she went from Googling "naked b…
I like getting my butt slapped - Samara and Caleb STARS talk [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:02:38
The most important move for a great sexual experience: having the talk. STARS is an easy-to-remember acronym for conversations that lead to awesome consensual sex. In this episode, Samara and Caleb have the STARS talk. T…
Post-Roe America - Grieving and next steps - Leah speaks [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 33:57
It's been a tough week. With the decision in Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization, fully half of the American population has lost the ability to make health care choices for our own bodies. We are now more regres…
I asked my fiancé if he's still attracted to me and he said no - Mia [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:07:11
While a stutter may seem like an impediment to clear communication, Mia says it helped her identify a perfect partner. She talks about how an early experience of being "the other woman" continues to affect her feelings a…
I learned fingering and blow jobs were a sin - Hannah [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:36:37
Purity ring, wedding ring ... cock ring?! After many conversations with people who have religious trauma around sexuality, it's a pleasure to finally welcome someone who grew up in conservative Christianity and has a hea…