"Why does criticism hurt so much?" Dr Julie on triggers and behaviour patterns

"Why does criticism hurt so much?" Dr Julie on triggers and behaviour patterns

Author: Fearne Cotton May 25, 2026 Duration: 58:46

Ever looked in the mirror and told yourself “I am enough” ...and not believed a word of it? Psychologist Dr Julie Smith reckons affirmations only work to boost confidence if – deep down – you already believe them.


In this chat with Fearne, Julie explains why your brain needs evidence, not mantras, to change your critical inner voice and build self-worth. She also talks through why criticism from others can hit so hard, and why the discomfort felt is often an echo of a much older wound. Julie breaks down how the patterns we developed in childhood keep replaying in adulthood.


Julie also talks about her breast cancer diagnosis, and how it tested everything she’d been teaching everyone else about fear, agency, and mental health.


Plus, what’s the simple therapy exercise that could change how you carry pain?


Dr Julie’s best-selling book, Open When, is available now in paperback.


If you liked this episode of Happy Place, you might also like:


Dr Julie’s first Happy Place episode


Estelle Bingham


Adele Roberts


Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.


In a world that often feels loud and demanding, Happy Place offers a different kind of conversation. Here, Fearne Cotton sits down with a wide range of fascinating people-from artists and athletes to experts and everyday heroes-to explore the nuanced realities of human experience. These discussions gently peel back the layers on topics like mental resilience, physical well-being, cultural shifts, and the complexities of our relationships, moving far beyond simple soundbites. The core of this podcast lies in its authentic curiosity about how individuals navigate life's inevitable highs and lows. Rather than prescribing a single path to joy, each episode uncovers personal definitions of contentment and peace, often found in unexpected moments or hard-won perspectives. Listening feels like being part of a thoughtful, intimate dialogue where vulnerability is welcomed and stories are shared without pretense. Whether the conversation touches on overcoming loss, finding creative inspiration, or building a healthier society, Fearne guides it with empathy and a genuine desire to understand. This collection of interviews provides a quiet space for reflection, reminding us that happiness is not a constant state but a deeply personal and evolving journey. Tune in for a sincere exploration of what it means to live fully across all facets of life.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

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