Show Up Anyway: What to Do When You Feel Like You Don't Belong

Show Up Anyway: What to Do When You Feel Like You Don't Belong

Author: Mission Ambition, LLC September 16, 2026 Duration: 47:36

Ep65: Show Up Anyway: What to Do When You Feel Like You Don't Belong

Hardcore and At Ease - powered by Others Over Self®

Mitze Alexander's first supervisor told her women didn't belong in the military. She had no barracks, no female support, and no one to tell, and she knows what it's like to feel like you don't belong somewhere you know you're supposed to be. She stayed anyway, and built a twenty-year career to prove him wrong.

Episode Description

Mitze Alexander knows what it feels like to walk into a room that's already decided you don't belong there. At her first duty station, an all-male aviation unit in Korea with no barracks and no female support, her supervisor told her outright that women didn't belong in the military. She stayed anyway. That decision sits underneath everything she's built since: twenty years in the U.S. Army and Michigan Army National Guard, seven years as a Muskegon patrol officer, and, for close to two decades now, a licensed trauma therapist specializing in PTSD, depression, and anxiety with military women. Host Shelly Rood and Mitze connected through Mission Ambition's second location in West Michigan, which provides tailored support to veterans across Muskegon County and the surrounding area.

In this episode, Mitze talks through what it actually takes to stay somewhere you've been told you shouldn't be, what that moment still demands of her to this day, and what she'd tell a woman living through the same thing right now.

Chapters

00:00 Carrying Others’ Weight

03:47 Meet Mitzi Alexander

05:45 Private Practice Realities

10:21 Military Woman’s Journey

25:26 National Guard Growth

27:12 From Policing to Social Work

34:11 Therapy Fit and Boundaries

45:12 Closing Reframe and Challenge

In This Episode You'll Discover

  • Why absorbing third-party trauma for a living requires real, enforced boundaries, not just good intentions
  • How the old operating system of "if I can hold it, I should" differs from Lived Authority's "I can hold it, and I still decide when I put it down"
  • What it took for a first-time enlistee to walk into an all-male unit with no barracks, no female support, and a supervisor who told her she didn't belong
  • Why Mitze left law enforcement to work in social work and clinical therapy instead
  • A concrete, repeatable way to release the weight of a hard day without waiting for it to pile up

Featured Guest

Mitze Alexander is a licensed therapist based in Muskegon, Michigan, specializing in trauma, PTSD, depression, and anxiety, with a focus on military women. She spent four years on active duty in the U.S. Army and twenty years in the Michigan Army National Guard, retiring at the rank of E6, followed by seven years as a patrol officer with the Muskegon Police Department. She now runs a private practice out of Just Us Divine Health and Wellness in Muskegon Heights.

Host

Shelly Rood, Host / Hardcore and At Ease | Veterans Radio / Co-Founder Mission Ambition, LLC

Resources & Links

Mission Ambition, LLC — West Michigan location serving veterans across Muskegon County: missionambition.org Others Over Self®: othersoverself.com Mission Wildflower Substack: shellyrood.substack.com

Subscribe & Connect

Subscribe to Hardcore and At Ease on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. Keep the conversation going at join.othersoverself.com.


Hardcore and At Ease-powered by Others Over Self® explores the quiet tension between relentless drive and sustainable peace. This isn't another leadership podcast about hustle culture or empty platitudes for work-life balance. Instead, it digs into a very specific, often unspoken dilemma: what happens when your innate intensity-your hardcore commitment to exceptional results-feels at odds with your well-being and the health of your team? You might recognize the feeling of operating from a constant state of urgency, wondering why success feels so arduous while others seem to navigate their careers and lives with more grace and less friction. The conversations here are built on the premise that you are not broken or lacking; the problem is that most conventional advice fails to address the core conflict of being both highly driven and genuinely at ease. Through candid interviews and reflective commentary, the podcast examines this intersection of business, culture, and personal philosophy. Listeners will hear practical frameworks and stories that challenge the either/or mindset, suggesting that profound achievement and profound calm aren't mutually exclusive. It’s for managers, founders, and anyone in a position of influence who is tired of the burnout narrative and seeks a more integrated, sustainable approach to ambition. Each episode aims to provide not just insight, but a tangible shift in perspective, helping you channel your deep care for results without sacrificing your sense of self or compassion for others. The dialogue is rooted in the principle that putting others over self isn't about martyrdom, but about building a foundation of trust and collective efficacy that, ironically, allows for greater individual focus and resilience. Tune in for a nuanced take on what it means to lead and live with both ferocious intent and genuine composure.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

Hardcore and At Ease - powered by Others Over Self®
Podcast Episodes
Built for a Different Body: How to Claim the Skills Nobody Documented [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 21:55
Episode 46: "Built for a Different Body: How to Claim the Skills Nobody Documented"Hardcore and At Ease | Powered by Others Over Self®You did the work. You figured it out. Everyone celebrated the result and nobody asked…
How to Prove Your Value So Others Carve Out a Place for You [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:05:34
Episode 45 — Angie Lommen: "How to Prove Your Value So Others Carve Out a Place for You"You have been putting in the work. Doing more than was asked. Saying yes before you had all the answers. And somehow nobody seems to…
The Curse of Knowledge Is Costing You Customers [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 33:15
Episode 44: "The Curse of Knowledge Is Costing You Customers" of Hardcore and At Ease - powered by Others Over Self®You have poured yourself into your offer. You know every corner of it. So why are the right people not f…
Stop Waiting to Build What Only You Can See [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 54:52
Episode 43 - Melissa Washington: "Stop Waiting to Build What Only You Can See"You can see exactly what's missing. You know you're the one to fill it. But you're waiting for the plan, the money, the perfect moment. What i…
How to Receive the Support You've Been Building for Everyone Else [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 45:17
Episode 42: "How to Receive the Support You've Been Building for Everyone Else"You can see exactly what everyone around you needs. Recognizing it in yourself is a different skill entirely — and many high-performing leade…
Selfridge Air Show Canceled: Whose Car Are You Looking For? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 38:11
Hardcore and At EaseEpisode 40 - John Stolz: "Selfridge Air Show Canceled: Whose Car Are You Looking For?"When the world is at war and the mission calls everyone away, what's left standing is everything you actually buil…
When the Path Disappears: Welcome to the Wilderness [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 32:25
Episode 39: "When the Path Disappears: Welcome to the Wilderness"You're not falling apart. You're in terrain that has no name yet. And that's exactly the problem.Most frameworks for ambitious people were built on one ass…
When the World Won't Calm Down: Leading from Your Center [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 52:49
Episode 38 - Erin Dunn: "When the World Won't Calm Down: Leading from Your Center"You can't eliminate the chaos. But you can stop letting it run you. What if the real leadership skill isn't handling pressure — it's build…
When the System Has You: Keeping Your Standards Intact Anyway [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 29:33
Episode 37: "When the System Has You: Keeping Your Standards Intact Anyway"You did everything right. So why is the institution coming after you? What happens to your leadership identity when performing at 100% still isn'…