The Birth of Sorrow | Part 1: Crossing into Neurotic-Level Narcissism

The Birth of Sorrow | Part 1: Crossing into Neurotic-Level Narcissism

Author: Mark Ettensohn, Psy.D. May 27, 2025 Duration: 17:07
Link to episode 1 in this series, on psychotic-level NPD: https://youtu.be/IoxUCbNUJUE Link to episode 2 in this series, on borderline-level NPD: https://youtu.be/Oz-C503q_9Y This is the third episode of a four-episode series describing the narcissistic personality style across different levels of severity. Due to the length of the material, this episode has been divided into three parts. This is part one. In this part, Dr. Ettensohn explores the developmental shift from borderline to neurotic-level personality organization, and how this shift transforms the inner life of individuals with narcissistic traits. Part one serves as a conceptual bridge—reviewing core ideas from earlier episodes while highlighting the emergence of psychological capacities that make neurotic-level functioning possible. These include the ability to maintain a continuous sense of self, to recognize others as enduring subjects, and to experience ambivalence, guilt, and loss without fragmentation. Through the lens of psychoanalytic developmental theory, Dr. Ettensohn illustrates how this shift brings with it new emotional burdens: the capacity to grieve, to feel remorse, and to live with an awareness of history. This part introduces the foundational concepts of subjectivity and historicity, which will be explored in greater depth in parts two and three. References: Kernberg, O. F. (1984). Severe personality disorders: Psychotherapeutic strategies. Yale University Press. Ogden, T. H. (1986). The matrix of the mind: Object relations and the psychoanalytic dialogue. International Universities Press. Ogden, T. H. (1989). The primitive edge of experience. Jason Aronson. Winnicott, D. W. (1965). The maturational processes and the facilitating environment: Studies in the theory of emotional development. International Universities Press.

In each episode of Heal NPD, clinical psychologist Mark Ettensohn, Psy.D., offers a grounded and compassionate look at narcissism, moving beyond the stereotypes that dominate casual conversation. Drawing from his professional practice, Dr. Ettensohn unpacks the complexities of narcissistic personality disorder and related patterns, providing clarity on their underlying mechanisms and impacts. This isn't about labeling or blame; it's a space for genuine understanding, whether you're a person seeking growth, a partner, a family member, or a professional in the field. You'll hear discussions that blend psychological science with practical insights, exploring pathways toward healing, setting boundaries, and fostering healthier relationships. The tone is educational yet accessible, demystifying a topic often shrouded in confusion and stigma. By tuning into this podcast, you gain a nuanced perspective from a specialist who approaches the subject with both clinical expertise and deep humanity. Dr. Ettensohn's thoughtful commentary aims to equip you with knowledge that is both intellectually sound and emotionally resonant, making Heal NPD a unique resource in the landscape of mental health dialogue.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

Heal NPD
Podcast Episodes
Lisa Taylor-Austin’s Interview with Dr. Ettensohn [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:12:02
This episode is the audio from an on-camera interview between licensed psychotherapist Lisa Taylor-Austin and Dr. Ettensohn. The video of this interview can be viewed on Lisa's youTube channel here: https://www.youtube.c…
Decoding NPD: The Critical Role of Attachment [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 22:41
In this episode, Dr. Ettensohn draws heavily on his own research concerning pathological narcissism and attachment patterns, using attachment theory as a lens to focus explanatory power onto the often confusing dynamics…
5 Common Misconceptions about NPD [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 27:27
In this episode, Dr. Ettensohn addresses 5 common misconceptions about pathological narcissism and NPD: 1. NPD is not a mental illness 2. NPD is not treatable 3. Even if NPD is treatable, actual healing is impossible 4.…
Boundaries, Assertiveness, and NPD [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 24:47
In this episode, Dr. Ettensohn discusses the important topic of boundaries. He provides a definition of interpersonal boundaries, discusses the reasons why boundaries are important for mental health and healthy relations…
What Causes Narcissistic Rage? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 19:04
In this episode, Dr. Ettensohn explores the possible causes of narcissistic rage, referencing the work of Ernest S. Wolf, a close collaborator with Heinz Kohut and author of the book 'Treating the Self: Elements of Clini…
Do Narcissists ”Know What They’re Doing?” [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 14:47
In this episode, Dr. Ettensohn discusses the topic of self-awareness in NPD. Numerous commenters have shared their belief that narcissists "know what they are doing"...that they are fully aware of the harm caused by thei…
Why Narcissists Lack Empathy [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 15:21
In this episode, Dr. Ettensohn outline 4 reasons why empathy may be impaired in pathological narcissism and NPD: 1. Lack of self awareness 2. Objectification of the self and others 3. A 'starvation mindset' 4. Avoidant a…
Illness Anxiety and NPD [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 10:35
In this episode, Dr. Ettensohn explores the connection between illness anxiety and pathological narcissism. This episode explores how illness anxiety in NPD can be disguised anxiety about loss of self or psychological di…
A Real Definition of Narcissistic Abuse [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 10:20
The term ‘narcissistic abuse’ has been, itself, heavily abused. Is has largely been a pop-psychology term that means different things depending on how and where it is used. It is often used to demonize individuals with p…