How to Connect With Your Partner on a Deeper Level | Love | E522

“We talk all the time, but I still feel alone in my marriage.” If that sentence has ever crossed your mind on a Tuesday night, mid-load of dishes, with your partner three feet away, you are not imagining it. And you are not the only one. In this episode, I sit down with Debra Fileta, the licensed therapist who has spent more than twenty years in clinical practice helping couples figure out exactly this. In This Episode The three levels of communication, and why almost every couple stalls at level two without realizing it Why “we talk all the time” is not the same thing as feeling close, even after twenty years of marriage The thirty-minute weekly ritual Debra and her husband John have used for fifteen years to keep their marriage from drifting Why being “nice” is not the same as having strong people skills, and the people-pleasing trap that masquerades as kindness How to tell the difference between a one-time conflict and a relationship pattern that is pointing at something deeper The volume-dial reframe for couples where one partner feels everything at a 7 and the other at a 3 The empathy practice that takes thirty seconds and changes the way you see almost everyone in your life Why “I keep attracting the wrong people” is the wrong question, and the better one Debra asks instead Why This Matters This episode is for anyone who has caught themselves thinking, something has shifted between us and I cannot put my finger on what. For the partner who feels like they are always the one initiating real conversation. For the couple who used to talk for hours and now mostly talks about logistics. For anyone who has wondered if needing more depth in their marriage is asking too much. It is not. And the way back is more learnable than you might think. xo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby Growing Self Special thanks to this month’s sponsors of the podcast Upwork — When you need specialized talent fast, Upwork gives you access to vetted professionals across 125+ categories, from marketing to web development to operations support. No long recruiting cycles. No guesswork. Just the right person, when you need them. Check it out at upwork.com — posting a job is free. Shopify — The all-in-one platform for building and growing your online business. Visit shopify.com/lhs to explore their tools and access exclusive listener discounts. OSEA — Amazing, clean, science-backed skincare made with the power of the sea. Use code LHS at oseamalibu.com for 10% off your first order. Quince — Quality products you’ll actually use that feel like luxury without the price tag. Get free shipping and 365-day returns at quince.com/lhs. LNutra Prolon — A science-backed, plant-based nutrition program that supports fat loss, metabolism, cellular rejuvenation, and overall longevity. Head to ProlonLife.com/LHS for 15% off your first order + a bonus gift.