Episode 168: Melting a child's freeze

Episode 168: Melting a child's freeze

Author: Marion Rose, PhD. February 28, 2024 Duration: 18:15
This is part of a series of episodes where I refer to topics in my new best-selling book, 'I'm Here and I'm Listening', and I read a story shared from a child's perspective. In this episode, I talk about the process of helping a child move out a freeze state (which in Aware Parenting we tend to refer to as dissociation, or a control pattern) and back into connection with their body and feelings. Once they do that, they can then express the feelings they were needing to suppress or dissociate from, and return to calm presence. I've always seen control patterns as like frozen feelings. Our role as parents is to offer the warmth and safety required to our child can experience those frozen feelings melting into flowing feelings, which can then flow out, generally in the form of crying or raging, but sometimes as laughter. To do this, we need to be relatively present in our own bodies, to support them to know that they are safe to become present in their own body, to feel and then express their feelings. Dissociation can show up in a myriad of ways, including thumb or finger sucking, dummy/pacifier use, repetitive nose picking or hair twirling, screens, eating when not hungry, and so on. In this episode, I share about what we can do as parents to help our child move out of the suppression of feelings into expression. I am so willing for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' to continue to be a best seller, and to reach the hands, hearts and minds of many many thousands of parents. If you'd like to support me with that, are you willing to share about the book, such as on social media? If you have been thinking of buying it, are you willing to buy it now or really soon, to support it to continue being a best seller? You can buy the paperback on Amazon by searching for 'I'm Here and I'm Listening' on the Amazon store in your country! Or send me a DM for the direct link! Big love xoxox www.marionrose.net

Marion Rose, PhD. hosts The Aware Parenting Podcast, drawing from her role as a level two instructor and regional coordinator for Australia and New Zealand within this philosophy. The foundation of her discussions is Aware Parenting, an approach developed by Aletha Solter, PhD. Rather than offering quick fixes or rigid rules, this podcast delves into the nuanced and often emotional landscape of raising children-and ourselves. Each episode considers the practical and psychological aspects of family life, from navigating daily challenges to understanding the deeper patterns that influence our reactions. You’ll hear explorations on how to support children’s emotional expression, build trusting relationships, and approach discipline from a place of connection. The concept of reparenting-the work we do to heal our own childhood experiences-is woven throughout, recognizing how our past shapes our present parenting. Marion’s perspective provides a compassionate framework for anyone looking to move beyond autopilot reactions and cultivate more awareness in their family dynamics. Tuning into this podcast feels like a thoughtful conversation with a knowledgeable guide, one that respects the complexity of both the child’s and the parent’s inner world.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

The Aware Parenting Podcast
Podcast Episodes
Episode 175: Food and feelings - a child's perspective [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 10:19
This is the last episode in the series related to my latest best-selling book, 'I'm Here and I'm Listening', before I return to finish the food series, so this episode is a kind of bridge back to that! Then I'll be start…
Episode 174: Why children aren't fighting sleep [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 12:45
In this episode, I talk about why children aren't fighting sleep, and why we're often fighting their natural relaxation response. I share concisely about how we can trust children and follow their lead and can then coope…
Episode 173: Screens, play and loving limits [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 12:48
In this episode, I share about how we can stay connected with children in relation to screens, including with attachment play. I offer some information that I wish I'd had when my children were younger, about loving limi…
Episode 172: Helping a hitting child [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 24:50
In this episode, I share about what's going on when a child is hitting. I talk about them being in the fight or flight response, and how we can help them move out of that state of hyperarousal, through feeling physically…
Episode 171: Blankets, bunnies and other control patterns [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 31:18
In this episode, I talk about when children use have a soft toy, blanket or other object as a control pattern. This might be something they use to suppress their feelings when going to sleep or during the day when feelin…
Episode 170: Loving limits Q and A [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 35:03
In this episode, I respond to questions about loving limits that parents asked on my social media accounts. They include: What happens when loving limits don't seem to work – eg, the child moves on to something else and…
Episode 169: Loving limits update [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 43:03
In this episode, I share an update on loving limits, after gaining lots of new clarity through the process of editing my latest best-selling book, 'I'm Here and I'm Listening'. and having conversations with Aletha Solter…
Episode 167: Leaving the park [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 16:59
Long gone are the days where parents who wanted to leave the park were told to just walk away and say "bye!" to their child. However, it can be so common for us as parents to feel really powerless when we want to leave t…