79 - Nicole Graev Lipson exposes the challenges of motherhood

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 Nicole Graev Lipson is the author of the memoir in essays Mothers and Other Fictional Characters. Her writing has appeared in The Sun, Virginia Quarterly Review, LA Review of Books, The Washington Post, The Boston Globe, and Marie Claire, among other venues. Her work has been awarded a Pushcart Prize, shortlisted for a National Magazine Award, and selected for The Best American Essays anthology. Originally from New York City, she lives outside of Boston with her husband and children.

Nicole's Notes from the Sidelines:

1. Needing an income paves a career path for women that takes them away from creative pursuits, and that career can become their identity.
2. Trying to be the kind of mother who doesn't mess up her kids, is patient, self-sacrificing, and doting leads to a loss of her creative side.
3. Mothers have been taught that the child's growth and success is linked to their every move and that there's no room for error, making it difficult for them to be creative.
4. Nothing makes a woman realize life is fleeting like parenthood. Time is finite, so use it the way your heart wants.
5. Many of our experiences prove valuable and impactful even when we don't realize it at the time.
6. The art of writing helps bring understanding to confusing topics.
7. There's nothing more dynamic than parenthood. We're growing, our kids are changing, and the world is in constant flux.
8. "Unspeakable topics" are only unspeakable until someone has the courage to speak them.
9. Safety makes vulnerability and complexity possible.
10. "Maternal Solitude Deficit" explains mothers wanting to be there for their kids and wanting to be alone.
11. It is incumbent upon mothers to act differently; we have a role we have in creating conditions around us.
12. Say NO to things you don't want to do.
13. Be forgiving with oneself, even if it's hard to resist societal pressures. Go easy on yourself.

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