We all have a version of "the plan." It’s the life we envisioned, the career path we mapped out, the forward momentum we believe we must maintain at all costs. But what happens when the life you’re actually living forces you to slam on the brakes?
I was talking with my dear friend Malika Malhotra on the podcast this week, and she told a story so vulnerable and profound that it’s been echoing in my mind ever since.
For years, Malika’s life was defined by motion. She and her family moved ten times across the United States. This wasn't a nomadic choice; it was a necessity dictated by her husband's demanding career as a highly specialized pediatric heart surgeon. With each new city came the immense, often invisible labor of rebuilding a life from scratch—finding new doctors, new schools, and new communities, all while her own ambitions in corporate advertising were put on the back burner.
She confessed that behind the resilience, there were dark days and a resentment that inevitably builds up. This last move, from Maine to Texas, hit differently. As a woman in her 50s, she found herself in a new city where making friends felt nearly impossible, leaving her with a feeling of deep loneliness.
The Light Switch That Wouldn't Turn On
As an entrepreneur, Malika had successfully run her own brand strategy business, including a core mastermind group for women. It was her thing. It was the part of her identity she had carved out for herself amidst the chaos.
But after this last move, something was different.
"It was like this light switch," she told me. "I couldn't turn it on and I've always been able to turn it on.".
It wasn't just stress or fatigue. It was a fundamental inability to keep pushing. The mental and emotional load of the move was so immense that she couldn't hold space for anyone else. She was at a breaking point.
The Unexpected Power of Pressing Pause
What Malika did next is a lesson for every ambitious person who feels like they’re failing when they’re actually just depleted. She didn't force it. She didn't "push through the pain."
She surrendered.
"I gave myself some grace and I said, you know what? Just, just press pause," she recalled. She made the difficult decision to cancel her mastermind group. She understood a crucial truth: "You can't press pause on your family... but you can press pause on this.".
In that pause, in the space created by letting go—something new had room to grow. With her time and mental energy freed up, she started exploring the world of AI. This exploration wasn't just a distraction; it was the start of a complete business reinvention. She funneled her expertise into creating "Lumi," a custom AI bot designed to deliver her unique brand strategy framework to clients.
In her words, she essentially "cloned herself," creating a scalable, portable, and less demanding way to run her business.
The breakthrough she never saw coming was a direct result of the breakdown she was forced to navigate. The ultimate irony?
"I think this move, if I didn't have this move, I wouldn't have gotten there.".
Malika’s story is such a powerful reminder that our greatest challenges often contain the seeds of our most profound transformations. It asks us to question our own relationship with ambition, control, and the "plans" we grip so tightly.
So, I’ll ask you what I’ve been asking myself: Where in your life are you trying to force a light switch on? What might happen if you gave yourself the grace to just... press pause?
Leave a comment below. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
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A Reminder for You
If you’re struggling right now, remember this: You’ve already survived 100% of your hardest days. Take it one small step at a time, and don’t hesitate to reach out for support.
About the Creator
Chitra Rochlani is a Wellness Coach, Speaker, and best-selling author of She’s on a mission to help her clients eliminate stress and loneliness, feel more aligned, and live a life of fulfillment and passion.As a medium and intuitive healer, she educates and empowers her clients to tap into their most underutilized superpower—their intuition—to navigate their lives and make WINx3 decisions.She uses her P.F.H. (Peel, Feel, Heal) framework to inspire transformation through:
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