The Hidden Costs of High Achievement: A Guide to High Functioning Codependency with Terri Cole

In today's episode, I interview psychotherapist Terri Cole about high functioning codependency (HFC), a term Terri coined to describe high-achieving individuals who take on excessive responsibility for others, often at their own expense. Terri explains the impact of HFC, such as stress and strained relationships, and highlights the importance of setting boundaries and allowing others to handle their own issues. Terri offers practical advice for breaking the cycle, including mindfulness techniques and self-regulation strategies. We discuss the benefits of overcoming HFC, like improved energy and relationships. Terri also shares relatable examples and encourages small, manageable steps to start change. Be sure to check out the amazing resources, including Terri’s book and a starter kit for those looking to break free from HFC. More about Terri: Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist and global relationship and empowerment expert and the author of Boundary Boss and Too Much! For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs. She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over a million people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show.  Liked this episode? Make sure to subscribe to our podcast and leave a review with your takeaways, this helps us create the exact content you want!  KEY POINTS:  00:00 Introduction and Welcome 00:42 Meet Terry Cole: Expert on Codependency 01:51 Understanding High Functioning Codependency 05:45 Terry's Personal Journey and Insights 11:55 Traits of High Functioning Codependency 17:03 Challenges and Recovery 23:30 Setting Boundaries with Loved Ones 24:22 The Journey to Recovery 25:13 The Cost of Overfunctioning 26:18 The Real Flex: Resisting the Urge to Fix 26:58 Surrender and Acceptance 28:04 Recognizing High Functioning Codependency 28:40 Tools for Change 30:08 The Importance of Vulnerability 31:17 Living Life Fully Present 31:44 Practical Steps to Recovery 40:18 Family Dynamics and Delegation 42:45 Conclusion and Resources QUOTABLES: And really, you start to see how, if they just give themselves the gift of surrender—and truly seeing and loving people for who they are, nothing more, nothing less—they can allow themselves to experience life, relationships, and intimacy in a whole new way  - Julie Solomon I'm talking about things we do voluntarily—things we've automatically taken on as our job, even when they don’t really need to be. The first question is, do I have the bandwidth to do this without becoming resentful? And the second is, do I even want to do it? - Terri Cole GUEST RESOURCES: Check out Terri's Book, TOO MUCH: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High Functioning Codependency. ➡️ Follow Terri on Instagram RESOURCES: [HIGH LEVEL SUPPORT] Ready to Scale Your Business and Build a Legacy? Join the Luminary Waitlist Now! [GET MORE VISIBLE] Turn your messaging into a client-attracting machine. Grow your authority and drive sales in just 1 hour per week. Click here to get access to my new training!  [ORDER] my book or Audible, Get What You Want: How to Go From Unseen to Unstoppable so you can leverage the power of your own influence. ➡️Follow Julie on Instagram! MUST HAVES THIS MONTH: [MEMBERFUL] Start growing your audience into a thriving community and membership business at memberful.com/julie.