Todd and Cathy discussed Cathy’s most recent Substack which were 10 quotes that impacted Cathy. The conversation covered a range of subjects including the balance between joy and sadness, the value of kindness and compassion, and the significance of critical thinking and role modeling in conversations.
For the full show notes, visit zenpopparenting.com.
Some Ways to Support Us
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- Attend ZenCon 25
- Order Restoring our Girls
- Join Team Zen
- Sign up for Cathy’s Substack
Other Ways to Support Us
This week’s sponsor(s):
- Avid Co DuPage County Area Decorating, Painting, Remodeling by Avid Co includes kitchens, basements, bathrooms, flooring, tiling, fire and flood restoration.
- MenLiving – A virtual and in-person community of guys connecting deeply and living fully. No requirements, no creeds, no gurus, no judgements
- Todd Adams Life & Leadership Coaching for Guys
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Meeting summary for https://us02web.zoom.us/j/82667986075?pwd=RlhaajhRWDIrZXAwai8zWkx2UWk4QT09 (01/06/2025)
Quick recap
Todd and Kathy discussed their upcoming podcast episode and conference, while sharing personal experiences and reflections on various life topics. Throughout the meeting, Todd emphasized the importance of authenticity, self-reflection, and finding joy in everyday experiences, drawing from philosophical concepts and personal anecdotes. The conversation covered a range of subjects including the balance between joy and sadness, the value of kindness and compassion, and the significance of critical thinking and role modeling in conversations.
Next steps
- Conference attendees to register for Zen Con 2025 within the next 2.5 weeks.
- Readers of “Restoring Our Girls” to leave 5-star reviews on Amazon or Goodreads if they found the book helpful.
- Sweetie to continue writing her weekly substack, ensuring it’s published on Fridays.
- Todd to review and potentially adjust his commitments, considering which tasks are truly necessary.
- Podcast listeners to consider sharing their art, writing, or teaching, as it may positively impact others.
Summary
Podcast Episode and Upcoming Conference
Todd and Cathy discussed their upcoming podcast episode, which will be their 797th. They also talked about their last conference, Zen Con 25, which is 18 days away. Todd encouraged anyone who can attend to join them, mentioning that they have scholarships available. They also discussed their vision boards and how they use them to set intentions. Kathy shared her moment, “Starting the Year with Empowering Quotes,” where she shared 10 quotes she thought were worth sharing with her subscribers. They also briefly discussed their recent holiday celebrations and how they had to readjust to normal life after the festivities.
Embracing Different Parts of Self
Todd discussed the importance of understanding and accepting different aspects of oneself, using the concept of ‘parts work’ and ‘internal family systems’. He emphasized the need to acknowledge and love these parts, rather than denying or repressing them, as they often act in protection or distraction. Todd also shared a quote by Jane Hirschfield about the unpredictability of life, using the example of a rock garden in Kyoto where one cannot see all the rocks from a single viewpoint. He suggested that this unpredictability can be both negative and positive, and that there is always something we cannot foresee. Todd concluded by emphasizing the need for humility in understanding our own lives and the lives of others.
Finding Joy Amidst Grief and Sadness
Todd discussed the importance of understanding paradox and the balance between joy and sadness. He shared personal experiences of feeling joy in the midst of grief and at funerals, highlighting the unique energy and connection present in such situations. Todd also reflected on the challenges of organizing funerals and the need for a suitable venue to accommodate the necessary events. He emphasized the importance of finding a balance between the binary nature of joy and sadness, and the need to appreciate the moments of joy amidst difficult situations.
Kindness, Compassion, and Humility in Life
Todd discussed the importance of kindness and compassion in making a difference in people’s lives. He shared a personal experience of receiving a meaningful quote from a listener, which he still looks at daily. Todd emphasized the value of humility and understanding one’s place in the world, drawing from a Zen saying that encourages embracing both the specialness and ordinariness of a person. He concluded by highlighting the significance of balancing ambition with everyday experiences and the importance of respecting one’s time on earth.
Finding Joy in Everyday Experiences
Todd discussed the importance of living an ordinary life and finding joy in everyday experiences. He shared his personal experiences of having lofty goals and achieving fame, but emphasized that these moments did not bring lasting happiness. Todd also referenced a quote from Jim Carrey, who suggested that being a millionaire for a day would not significantly change one’s life. Todd concluded by expressing his preference for simple comforts and spending time with loved ones, rather than pursuing fame or wealth.
Demi Moore’s Acting Career and Legacy
Todd discusses his appreciation for Demi Moore’s acting career and her recent Golden Globe win for the film “The Substance.” He highlights her breakout role in “Ghost” and how she paved the way for higher pay for female actors in films like “Striptease” and “G.I. Jane.” Todd also recalls her iconic Vanity Fair pregnancy cover and the ups and downs of her personal life, expressing happiness for her long-overdue recognition as an accomplished actress. He and his friend reminisce about her standout performances, particularly in “Ghost” and “St. Elmo’s Fire.”
Embracing Self-Reflection and Prioritization
Todd discussed the importance of self-reflection and prioritization in life. He shared a quote about societal expectations and the need to let go of unnecessary pressures. He emphasized the importance of making space for oneself and recognizing what’s truly important. Todd also shared his personal experiences of balancing work and family responsibilities, and the need to appreciate the daily joys often taken for granted. He encouraged the group to reflect on their priorities and invest in what truly matters.
Embracing Authenticity and True Connection
Todd shared his appreciation for the beauty of life, using the example of sunsets and sunrises as a reminder of the importance of living authentically. He used a parable about a rabbi named Zuziah to emphasize the importance of being true to oneself, rather than striving to impress others or fit into a certain crowd. Todd also highlighted the difference between loneliness and being alone, suggesting that true connection comes from being surrounded by people who understand and accept who you are.
Authenticity, Self-Expression, and Human Connection
Todd and Ty discussed the importance of authenticity and self-expression in their lives. Todd shared his experiences with his body temperature and blanket preferences, emphasizing the importance of being true to oneself. They also discussed the influence of philosophers like Soren Kierkegaard and Leo Tolstoy on their perspectives on life. Todd highlighted the impact of sharing one’s work, such as writing a book or creating a podcast, on others’ lives. He also reminisced about his parents and mother-in-law, emphasizing the importance of building strong relationships that can last beyond one’s lifetime. The conversation concluded with a quote from Ricky Gervais’ show, emphasizing the beauty of being human and the importance of planting trees for others to enjoy.
Critical Thinking and Role Modeling
Todd discussed the importance of critical thinking and role modeling in conversations, particularly with children. He shared a personal experience with his daughter Skylar, who had been struggling with eating, and how he used the opportunity to understand her perspective and encourage her to open up. Todd also emphasized the need to avoid turning every conversation into a lesson and to be a normal human being, asking questions and showing genuine interest. He concluded by thanking the sponsors of the upcoming conference, Zen Con, and encouraged everyone to attend.
