317: What exactly IS codependency? (How do you know if you’re codependent?) (ft. Jason Lange)

317: What exactly IS codependency? (How do you know if you’re codependent?) (ft. Jason Lange)

Author: Melanie Curtin July 12, 2024 Duration: 1:00:55

"It felt kind of like a trap, but at the same time felt like a soothing warm blanket to feel safe and ruminate within."

"The codependent relationship is filled with drama. There is blaming, a victim and the rescuer/protector. That rescuer is filled with needing to be needed. That’s where it began for me."

"It was years of trying as hard as I could to make things better but never being good enough to matter how hard I tried."

The word "codependence" gets thrown around a lot, but it's not always clear what it means. How do you know if you're codependent? How do you know if your partner is codependent? Can one person be codependent while the other isn't?

Here we delve into our own personal experiences of codependency, as well as the experiences of some of our clients. We aim to provide clarity on codependent dynamics and how to overcome them.

In Jason's words, "Too many men stay in a place of perpetual suffering." If your love relationships have never felt quite right -- if they've always felt off, or you've felt like you were just taking care of your partner (she couldn't take care of herself), or you've never felt like you could get it right with your partner (nothing was ever enough), this will be relevant for you.

A lot of the men we work with are aching for MORE, and I just want to say -- that's available. You don't have to stay stuck. Growth is always possible.

Work with us

Want to go deeper than the podcast? Jason and I are ready to work with you! We specialize in helping men break old patterns and transform their sex & love lives for good.

To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)

---

Memorable quotes from this episode: 

  • “We’re deeply entwined with each other where there’s almost no agency or independence.”
  • “While the relationship was ‘safe’, we were both suffering deeply inside.”
  • “As long as my partner was approving of me, there was a sense of, ‘I’m OK.’”
  • “There was a fear — if I’m not with her, I’ll be alone.”

Melanie Curtin hosts Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women, a space where curiosity meets practical change. This isn't about memorizing pick-up lines or playing games; it's built on the idea that genuine personal growth is the most attractive quality a man can develop. The conversations here move beyond surface-level tips to explore the deeper dynamics of connection, drawing from insights across health, culture, and psychology. You'll hear from women who offer a candid look into what fosters real attraction and lasting partnership, providing a valuable perspective often missing from mainstream advice. Each episode tackles the honest questions and challenges men face, whether navigating early dating, deepening intimacy, or building a resilient marriage. The focus is always on actionable understanding-how to listen, communicate, and show up in ways that are both authentic and effective. Tune in for a podcast that respects your intelligence and meets you where you are, offering a blend of straightforward talk and nuanced discussion that can reshape how you approach every aspect of your life with women. It's for any man ready to move past confusion and toward more meaningful, fulfilling connections.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women
Podcast Episodes
395: Welcome! Here's how to get the most out of this podcast. [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 15:39
We've got close to 400 episodes, and with the new year, I felt inspired to categorize Dear Men in order to help you get the most out of it!I've broken it down into six buckets, then listed episodes in an order I believe…
394: Why is polarity so critical for attraction? (ft. Jason Lange) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:02:07
Have you ever been in a relationship where it felt like the spark had died? There's no chemistry but you're going through the motions, wishing there was more heat, more aliveness, more oomph.If so, you might have been bu…
392: Why is it so hard to quit porn!? (ft. Jason Lange) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:06:08
How do you know if you're addicted to porn?Instead of addiction language, some mental health specialists use the term Problematic Porn Use to discuss this. The heart of it is the same, however: How do I stop watching por…
390: What is foreskin restoration? (ft. Bob Werner) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:30:22
Why do you need to know about this?---Work with usReady to go deeper than the podcast and take action? Jason and I can help you break old patterns and transform your sex & love life for good. To see if you're a fit for o…