350: Weed, Porn, and Masturbation: The Trifecta! (ft. Jason Lange & Luke Adler)

350: Weed, Porn, and Masturbation: The Trifecta! (ft. Jason Lange & Luke Adler)

Author: Melanie Curtin February 28, 2025 Duration: 1:03:09

"Porn was the #1 relationship I had in terms of intimacy."

So says Jason on his experience of sex, love, and closeness in his 20s. (Fortunately, after engaging in personal growth, including men's work, he's now married to a radiant goddess!)

If you've ever struggled with your relationship to porn -- and if that has also impacted your relationship to sex and sexuality, you're far from alone. Countless clients of ours start out with a challenging dynamic with porn, and here's the truth: Porn use isn't really about porn. Weed use isn't really about weed, either.

When it comes to using weed, porn & masturbation, and other substances like alcohol, as Luke puts it, "It’s almost always covering up deeper material that men do not know how to handle."

The good news? There are lots of ways to handle that material, safe spaces within which to process it, and a TON of energy, vitality, and joy on the other side.

Remember: Personal growth works, so work it.

---

Work with us

Want to go deeper than the podcast? Jason and I are ready to work with you! We specialize in helping men break old patterns and transform their sex & love lives for good.

To see if there's a fit for our flagship program Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)

---

Memorable quotes from this episode:

  • “When I watch porn, I have the freedom to experience pleasure and the freedom to not experience rejection.”
  • “Gimme the weed again because I don’t want to feel the Shame Guy!”
  • “We all do things to avoid feeling the thing that we don’t want to feel.”
  • “Emotion starts as sensation in the body.”
  • “Most of what ails you can be significantly soothed by connection.”

Melanie Curtin hosts Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women, a space where curiosity meets practical change. This isn't about memorizing pick-up lines or playing games; it's built on the idea that genuine personal growth is the most attractive quality a man can develop. The conversations here move beyond surface-level tips to explore the deeper dynamics of connection, drawing from insights across health, culture, and psychology. You'll hear from women who offer a candid look into what fosters real attraction and lasting partnership, providing a valuable perspective often missing from mainstream advice. Each episode tackles the honest questions and challenges men face, whether navigating early dating, deepening intimacy, or building a resilient marriage. The focus is always on actionable understanding-how to listen, communicate, and show up in ways that are both authentic and effective. Tune in for a podcast that respects your intelligence and meets you where you are, offering a blend of straightforward talk and nuanced discussion that can reshape how you approach every aspect of your life with women. It's for any man ready to move past confusion and toward more meaningful, fulfilling connections.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Dear Men: How to Rock Sex, Dating, and Relationships With Women
Podcast Episodes
369: GuyTalk: Setting healthy boundaries with parents [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:47:57
Did you have healthy boundaries modeled for you when you were growing up? Do you feel like you know how to set healthy boundaries with your folks?If not, then some of these things may apply:You felt like (or continue to…
368: Can a live retreat change everything? (ft. Jason Lange) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 55:08
When Jason was in his mid-20s, he was stuck. He numbed out with porn much of the time, had never had sex, and struggled with dating and love relationship.Even outside of dating, it felt like something was missing in his…
366: Love can, in fact, be calculated. (ft. Zoey Charif) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:00:05
Have you ever wished you could scientifically determine what’s wrong in your relationship? Or felt it would be helpful to somehow mathematically see how compatible you are with someone you’re dating? Or gone through a di…
362: From skeptic to believer (ft. Naushad Godrej) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:24:06
Have you ever doubted? Whether you've doubted yourself, the existence of a higher power, the efficacy of "alternative" healing techniques, or anything that goes against the mainstream -- this has likely come up for you a…
361: Worried about being a late bloomer? (ft. Jason Lange) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:11:26
Are you concerned about your lack of experience, whether that's sexually, in a dating context, or time in long-term relationships? Maybe you feel behind in some way, and hesitant or fearful about telling a woman about yo…
360: GirlTalk: Striking while the iron is hot! [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:32:22
Want to be even sexier to women than you are now? ;) Learn to strike while the iron is hot!Seriously though -- striking while the iron is hot makes you a man who can generate polarity, build trust, and have women want to…