Kristin Scott Thomas – ‘Having children allowed me to see where I’d gone wrong’

Kristin Scott Thomas – ‘Having children allowed me to see where I’d gone wrong’

Author: Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment June 24, 2026 Duration: 52:41
In a career spanning four decades, Dame Kristin Scott Thomas has become one of Britain’s most celebrated actors: Four Weddings and a Funeral, The English Patient, The Horse Whisperer, Tell No One and Slow Horses, alongside acclaimed stage work including her Olivier‑winning performance in The Seagull. Yet her path was far from straightforward: discouraged at drama school, she moved to Paris as an au pair and rebuilt her training from scratch. Her childhood had already been shaped by profound loss after the deaths of her father and stepfather in near‑identical accidents. She has now channelled these experiences into her directorial debut, My Mother’s Wedding, which she also co‑wrote and stars in, alongside Scarlett Johansson, Sienna Miller and Emily Beecham. We talk about her early grief, the emotional armour she built as a teenager, the chaotic experience of filming with Prince, making My Mother’s Wedding, the power of women writing women, her unforgettable Fleabag monologue and the joy and clarity she has found in her 60s. ✨ IN THIS EPISODE: 00:00 Intro 03:15 Reclaiming a Tragic Narrative 04:59 Joy in her 60s 06:22 Co Writing With Her Husband 07:03 Animation and Childhood Memory 09:07 Casting and Creative Reunions 12:23 Failure One: Prince Film Debut 17:06 Fame Theater and Radical Roles 24:09 Under the Cherry Moon Lessons 25:28 Failure Two: Teenage Grief 26:24 Childhood Losses 27:58 Eldest Sibling Burden 28:37 Acting Through Sadness 29:59 English Patient Reflections 33:19 Four Weddings Role 36:39 Therapy and Healing 43:41 Grief Advice and Faith 45:45 Football and Identity 49:16 Aging and Gratitude 💬 QUOTES TO REMEMBER: “I wanted to take my past and make it into something positive.” “If people enjoy what you do, it’s not bad.” “Having children allowed me to see where I’d gone wrong and where I was beating myself up.” 🔗 LINKS + MENTIONS: Kristin’s directorial debut, My Mother’s Wedding, is now available in UK cinemas and streaming platforms such as Amazon Prime and Apple TV Join the How To Fail community: www.howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content Elizabeth’s Substack: www.theelizabethday.substack.com 📚 WANT MORE? Rosamund Pike - this episode explores how her career has resisted tidy narratives, how she’s navigated fame without reading reviews for 25 years and how her so‑called “failures” – not getting married, struggling with fear, raising two sons while working, even a disastrous attempt at cooking a rabbit – have shaped her. It’s ultimately about a woman interrogating identity, courage and the stories she tells herself:http://swap.fm/l/tePOA4HZ2PoaBBwudnv7 💌 LOVE THIS EPISODE? Subscribe on Spotify, Apple or wherever you get your podcasts Leave a 5⭐ review – it helps more people discover these stories 👋 Follow How To Fail & Elizabeth: Instagram: @elizabday TikTok: @howtofailpod Podcast Instagram: @howtofailpod Website: www.elizabethday.org Guest bookings for How To Fail only come from official @sonymusic.com emails Elizabeth and Kristin answer listener questions in our subscriber series: www.howtofail.supportingcast.fm/#content Have a failure you’re trying to work through for Elizabeth to discuss? Click here to get in touch: howtofailpod.com Production & Post Production Coordinator: Eric Ryan Engineer: Matias Torres Assistant Producer: Shania Manderson Senior Producer: Hannah Talbot Executive Producer: Alex Lawless Find more great podcasts from Sony Music Entertainment at sonymusic.com/podcasts To bring your brand to life in this podcast, email podcastadsales@sonymusic.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

There's a quiet revolution happening in how we think about success, and How To Fail With Elizabeth Day is right at the heart of it. This isn't about schadenfreude or wallowing in misfortune. Instead, Elizabeth Day has created a space where the most interesting conversations begin with a simple, radical premise: our lowest moments are often our greatest teachers. Each episode, a guest-from celebrated artists and thinkers to everyday people with extraordinary stories-sits down to examine three significant failures from their own life. The magic lies in the excavation, as Elizabeth guides the discussion toward the unexpected wisdom and resilience that emerged from those setbacks. You'll hear the raw honesty in their voices, the laughter that comes with hindsight, and the profound clarity that failure can uniquely provide. This podcast, presented by Elizabeth Day and Sony Music Entertainment, digs into the messy, human stuff of life that connects us all, transforming shared vulnerability into a source of collective strength. It’s a reminder that the path to any meaningful achievement is rarely a straight line, but a series of instructive detours. The show actively invites listeners to reflect on their own stories, fostering a genuine community around the idea that we can all succeed better by understanding where we've previously stumbled. Tune in for conversations that are as comforting as they are challenging, and which might just change your perspective on what it means to live a well-lived life.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

How To Fail With Elizabeth Day
Podcast Episodes
ON FAMILY DYNAMICS… With Bella Freud and Danny Dyer [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 21:48
Families are fascinating: how those first bonds shape our understanding of love, security and ourselves. In this episode, we revisit episodes with Bella Freud and Danny Dyer, who each open up about the simultaneous beaut…
Mo Gilligan - Fatherhood Is A Gift I Didn’t Know I Needed [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 52:12
Mo Gilligan started out working in retail (think Jo Malone and Levi’s) but quit in 2018 when his online comedy videos went viral. The leap paid off - sell-out tours across the UK, a late-night entertainment show on Chann…
ON FINDING LOVE AT ANY AGE… With Luke Evans and Dolly Alderton [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 28:20
We’re taught that love should happen early, and if it doesn’t, something’s gone wrong. But what if that’s not true? In this episode, we hear from past How to Fail guests who found love later, or in their own time. Luke E…
Shabaz Ali - ‘I’ll be a diversity quota as long as I get paid’ [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 49:02
A few years ago, Shabaz Ali was a chemistry teacher in Blackburn. Today, he’s one of the internet’s most beloved creators, best known as Shabaz Says, with millions of fans and a knack for skewering the most outrageous (a…
ON FINDING HOPE IN ADVERSITY… With Sir Chris Hoy and Michael Rosen [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 19:44
This week we’re revisiting two deeply moving conversations that explore what it means to find hope in the face of profound adversity. First, we hear from the 11-time world champion and a six-time Olympic champion, Sir Ch…
ON THE IMPACT OF EARLY FAME… With Shania Twain and Charlotte Church [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 32:09
Fame isn’t always limousines, five star hotels, champagne and private jets. I find this topic totally fascinating and these two past How to Fail guests give us a glimpse behind the curtain as to what becoming famous at a…
Martin Freeman - ‘We should be saying no to our kids’ [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 53:44
Martin Freeman is one of the most sought-after actors of his generation. Whether it’s Tim in The Office, John - the mild-mannered porn actor in Love Actually, Watson in Sherlock, Bilbo in The Hobbit, the stressed parent…
ON PANIC ATTACKS… With Jamie Laing and Fearne Cotton [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 16:51
Panic attacks are wide-spread in today’s society, and yet remain something we rarely talk about openly. So it’s vital that we normalise an experience so many of us share - because talking about it is often the first step…