Ep 142: Emotional eating: the shame cycle and how to break it

Ep 142: Emotional eating: the shame cycle and how to break it

Author: Ashleigh VanHouten & Rachel Gregory | Fitness, Strength Training, Wellness September 15, 2026 Duration: 53:29

In this episode, Rachel and Ashleigh talk about recent struggles with comfort eating, sharing the reality that nearly EVERYONE has experienced at least once: eating in secret, or feeling shame and guilt over their food choices, and eating in a way that doesn't support your goals even when you know you don't really want to. Why do we sometimes eat compulsively even when we tell ourselves we shouldn't, or don't want to? Why do we feel so much shame around "guilty pleasure" eating?

Rachel also shares where she has been over the past few months, including another heartbreak/grief cycle, a period of depression, starting a low dose antidepressant, and the body image feelings that come with regaining weight.

In addition to sharing some very personal stories, they also offer a range of strategies and tactics for breaking habits that aren't serving you: things like urge surfing, planning, mindfulness and other therapies that can have a big impact. 

Some big lessons come out of this episode, including the fact that you are not alone in your struggles; externalizing your fears can make them less scary; and there is always work to be done (and why this is a good thing!)

Thank you to our sponsor, True Nutrition, where you can customize your own protein! Choose a mix of protein bases, a range of delicious flavors and sweetness level, and boost your protein with adaptogens, collagen, immune support, electrolytes and much more. Ashleigh loves the chocolate fudge brownie with a grassfed New Zealand beef protein base, and Rachel is testing different protein base combos for the ultimate protein ice cream recipe. Save time, effort, and money by combining all your supplement needs into one delicious protein powder. Head to truenutrition.com/MUSCLE and use the code MUSCLE for 20% off your custom mix!

Chapters
00:13 What this episode covers instead of fiber
03:44 Listener feedback on the Strong and Sculpted Shoulders program
05:48 Using food to take the edge off
08:36 Why the brain defaults to food under stress
10:16 Shame, guilt, and eating in secret
11:43 Meeting the pattern with compassion instead of shame
15:13 Getting back on track faster instead of never messing up
16:04 Urge surfing and pausing before you react
19:30 Interrupting the pattern and building new pathways
21:16 Setting up your environment and taking a portion instead of the whole bar
24:43 Working with a coach, structure, and tracking as data
26:11 Change takes time, Ashleigh on eating two dinners
28:25 Rachel on the past few months
30:18 Getting lean while depressed
32:41 Starting an antidepressant and what changed
36:27 Body image, postpartum, and pressure in the fitness industry
39:29 Externalizing it and asking for help
41:27 Stigma around antidepressants and weight loss drugs
45:43 What this podcast is for
47:00 The work is not done
48:55 Sponsor break, True Nutrition
51:42 Sign off

Takeaways

  • Both hosts say they eat to cope with stress, and both say that knowing the mechanism does not stop them doing it.
  • Rachel frames the goal as getting back faster rather than never slipping, and says that interrupting the pattern even once starts building new pathways you can prove to yourself.
  • Ashleigh's tool is putting time between the urge and the reaction, five or ten minutes, then deciding, so the choice is a made one either way.
  • Rachel's portion approach for clients: take a serving instead of the whole bar, eat it somewhere else, pay attention to it, then step away and pick a different way to cope if the feeling is still there.
  • Rachel says a low dose antidepressant has helped alongside therapy and her own work, and she is careful to say the medication did not cause the weight gain.

Watch on YouTube: https://youtu.be/vehl-lpMXM8 

Programs

Newsletter: https://substack.com/@musclescienceforwomen 

Ashleigh VanHouten: https://ashleighvanhouten.com , Instagram @themusclemaven
Rachel Gregory: https://rgfit.com , Instagram @rachelgregory.cns


Ashleigh VanHouten and Rachel Gregory, the co-creators behind the Muscle Science for Women training program, bring their combined expertise as a health coach and a nutritionist-strength specialist into a regular, down-to-earth conversation. This isn't about generic fitness advice; it's a deep, practical look at how women can build strength and wellness on their own terms. Each episode feels like pulling up a chair with two knowledgeable friends who genuinely understand the specific physiological and cultural landscape women navigate in gyms and kitchens. They tackle the real questions-from optimizing nutrition for energy and recovery to designing effective training sessions and critically examining fitness trends. The dialogue is always rooted in science but delivered without jargon, making complex topics like metabolism, hormonal influences, and sustainable habit change both accessible and actionable. Tuning into this podcast offers a reliable source of clarity amidst the noise, transforming the principles of muscle science into a personalized roadmap for anyone looking to feel stronger and more confident. You'll hear honest discussions that blend evidence with experience, all aimed at empowering your individual health journey.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

Muscle Science for Women
Podcast Episodes
Sneak Peek: NEW Healthy Aging Series [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:08:58
In this exclusive sneak peek, Ashleigh shares the first full episode of a new series on Healthy Aging she has developed with friend, Carnivore-ish co-author, wellness writer, and chef Beth Lipton. Over the course of seve…
Ep 102: Muscle-building tips for teens | Are you eating enough? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 41:10
In this episode Ashleigh talks about a reel of hers that went viral; shows the ladies are binging; advice for a teenager just starting her muscle-building journey; how much organ meat you should be eating to get the bene…
Celebrating 100 episodes! [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 31:04
Today is the 100th episode of Muscle Science for Women! We've had a blast learning and sharing our knowledge with each other, and with our listeners, and we appreciate each and every one of you who tune in and spend time…
Ep 99: Ashleigh's birth story - Part 1 [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:55:30
While we wait for Ashleigh to recover from her second birth, we decided to re-release an episode from before the rebranding of the podcast. Back in 2021, when the podcast was called Muscle Maven Radio, Ashleigh did a lon…
Ep 97: The differences in training for strength vs. hypertrophy [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 50:34
Today is another re-release of a popular episode from a while back you may have missed: in this one, Ashleigh and Rachel discuss the nuances between training for strength and training for muscle growth (hypertrophy). The…
Ep 96: Can you eat intuitively and still lose weight / gain muscle? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 1:06:05
Today is a re-release of a popular episode you may have missed with Rachel and Ashleigh all about the idea of "intuitive eating" - what does that term mean, exactly? Is it possible to eat intuitively in a food landscape…