198. Lyndsey Hackford: The Abuse I Thought Was Love

Domestic violence doesn't usually begin with violence. It often begins with what appears to be love. Small compromises become expectations. Isolation is disguised as protection. Control masquerades as concern. Little by little, the person you once were begins to disappear, often without you even realizing it's happening. Domestic violence survivor and advocate Lyndsey Hackford joined me to discuss her journey through years of coercive control, emotional abuse, physical violence, and the incredibly difficult process of rebuilding her life after escaping an abusive marriage. Lyndsey speaks candidly about the psychological realities of abuse, why leaving is often the most dangerous time for a survivor, and the long road toward rediscovering confidence, identity, and hope. Today, Lyndsey uses her experience to advocate for survivors across the country through speaking engagements and her own podcast, Living in the Aftermath, where she creates space for honest conversations about trauma, healing, resilience, and life beyond abuse. Whether you're a survivor, someone who loves a survivor, or simply want a deeper understanding of how domestic violence really works, this is a conversation you won't soon forget. An important side note: if you're finding value in this show and these amazing episodes, please take a moment to leave a 5-star rating on your podcast platform. AND, follow SexualAssaultSurvivorStories on Instagram, then, please send me a note of support. I can't tell you how much your emails mean to me—they fuel my passion to keep this podcast going. And if you're a victim or survivor and are ready to tell your story in order to help yourself or someone else heal, let me know, and we can start a conversation about the possibility of you being on the show. Here's my email address: dave@sasstories.com Thank you to all of you who have reached out to me already. Just provide me with a phone number where I can reach back out to you…because I like to talk to people who are interested in guesting. And please keep those emails and texts coming…I truly look forward to hearing from you! Here are some critically important links that I hope you'll take the time to explore, and where a contribution is requested, please consider doing so! Lyndsey's Podcast Living in the Aftermath with Lyndsey https://livingintheaftermath.com/ (official website, if available through her podcast branding) (Apple Podcasts) Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/living-in-the-aftermath-with-lyndsey/id1832389204 (Apple Podcasts) Social Media Instagram: @living.inthe.aftermath (Apple Podcasts) Personal Instagram: @lyndseyh6723 (Apple Podcasts) Listen to Other Interviews with Lyndsey That's Where I'm At : "Living in the Aftermath with Lyndsey Hackford: Stories of Survival, Advocacy, and Hope Beyond Abuse" (sites.libsyn.com) Shattered Silence Podcast : "Healing After Domestic Violence" (Apple Podcasts) The Rollercoaster Podcast: "I Was Abused But Thought It Was Love…" (Spotify) Media Coverage FOX 13 Utah "Utah survivor of domestic violence shares her story from victim to advocate." (FOX 13 News Utah (KSTU)) Daily Herald "Healthy Relationships Should Be for Everyone" (featuring Lyndsey's advocacy work). (heraldextra.com) Domestic Violence Resources Mentioned The Refuge Utah https://therefugeutah.org National Domestic Violence Hotline https://www.thehotline.org Call: 800-799-SAFE (7233) https://1in6.org/ https://soulwisesolutions.com https://safeinharmsway.org https://sironahealing.com/ https://www.whattheydontsay.com www.arcigrey.com https://startbybelieving.org https://evawintl.org/ As mentioned, and emphasized, it's time to Normalize the Conversation.™ And please remember to Start by Believing…because we all know someone whose life has been impacted by rape or sexual assault. Thank you for tuning in. -Dave