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Episode 486: No one on my team talks and skip level meetings

Episode 486: No one on my team talks and skip level meetings

Author: Jamison Dance and Dave Smith November 10, 2025 Duration: 29:19
Soft Skills Engineering
Technology

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

  1. I work at a big tech company on a remote team of about 10 people, and most of them have been here for 5+ years. I’m in the “newer” half of the team with 4 years here. My problem is, in group meetings, absolutely NO ONE talks. I mean zero small talk, they have trouble responding to simple yes or no questions. Everyone participates thoroughly when it’s a technical discussion, but it’s clear no one has any interest in speaking more than necessary. We used to have one super talkative guy on our team, and even then it was mostly silence to his chats about his weekend. Is there anything I can do to get these people to speak at least a little bit? It feels insane how little I know about these people after 4 years.

    P.S. even in one on one chats, almost all of them shut down small talk

  2. A coworker told me that I should be having quarterly one-on-one’s with my skip to make sure they’re aware of all the good stuff I’ve been up to and my goal of promotion. This sounds correct, but feels weird when I think about setting this up. I haven’t had much direct communication with my skip, just a few responses to his questions during design meetings, but nothing else really. How do I feel less weird about this?


The weekly advice Soft Skills Engineering podcast, hosted by Jamison Dance and Dave Smith, operates on a simple but profound premise: writing excellent code is only one part of a successful career. The real challenges-and opportunities-often lie in everything else. This is a show dedicated entirely to the human side of software development. Each episode tackles the messy, complicated, and frequently unspoken questions that developers face daily. You’ll hear thoughtful discussions and practical advice on navigating office politics, having difficult conversations with managers, negotiating salaries, managing time and energy, collaborating effectively on a team, and building a sustainable, long-term career without burning out. It’s the crucial curriculum that most computer science degrees never cover. Jamison and Dave bring a blend of experience, empathy, and humor to these topics, offering perspectives that are both actionable and relatable. For anyone who has ever wondered how to handle a toxic coworker, get promoted, or simply find more fulfillment in their work, this podcast provides a much-needed forum. It’s a consistent source of guidance for the parts of the job that don’t involve a compiler, reminding listeners that their growth as a professional is inextricably linked to their growth as a communicator, a colleague, and a person. Tune in for honest conversations that go beyond the technical screen.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

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