Reshaping Your Relationship To Porn with Dr Sarah Ashton

Reshaping Your Relationship To Porn with Dr Sarah Ashton

Author: freyagraf March 9, 2026 Duration: 1:15:49

This week in The Labia Lounge I chat with founder of SHIPS (Sexual Health and Intimacy Psychological Services) and the Institute of Sexual Health Psychology Australia (ISHPA), Sarah Ashton. Dr Sarah Ashton is a sexual health psychologist and author with over 18 years’ experience working in trauma-informed sexual health, attachment, and complex sexual issues, so she's the perfect person to break down the topic of this episode with! The topic being PORN.


We discuss porn’s potential for both positive self-discovery as well as its more challenging effects, tackling questions around porn addiction, “problematic use,” how it changes our brains, and why it’s so difficult to moderate in the age of smartphones and algorithm-driven content. The conversation also accounts for neurodivergent experiences and the societal forces that make porn so accessible, addictive and insidious.


Key topics covered:

  • Sarah's PhD research into young women's experiences with porn, including the impact on self-image, pleasure, and consent.
  • Indicators of problematic porn use and why so many people (neurodiverse or not) find it a slippery slope.
  • Porn's unique power due to anonymity, unlimited access, algorithmic escalation, and cultural shame around sexuality.
  • The neurological impact of habitual porn use—how it rewires our arousal blueprint, hijacks pair bonding, and affects dopamine pathways.
  • Hopeful strategies for re-establishing a healthier, more intentional relationship with porn, including embodied self-pleasure, imagination, and practical tools for “detoxing” and recalibrating.
  • How societal norms and gender roles are shaped (and sometimes amplified or warped) by porn, especially for young people just starting to explore their sexuality.
  • Support resources: a self-guided course on reclaiming your relationship with porn (with a discount code for listeners!), and Sarah's upcoming book, "When Trauma Affects Sex."


If you’ve ever struggled with your relationship to porn or wondered how it truly affects your mind, body, and relationships, this episode brings compassion, evidence, and practical tools to help you navigate this stuff. You’re definitely not alone—and, as Sarah reminds us in this episode, recovery and empowerment are possible!


Plus you can expect all the usual antics and hilarious, vulnerable n' relatable personal stories and signature segments that you've come to know and love here in The Labia Lounge!


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Hosted by holistic sex coach and Yoni Mapping Therapist Freya Graf, The Labia Lounge is a candid and often hilarious space for conversations that mainstream culture often tiptoes around. This podcast delves into the interconnected realms of sexuality, womanhood, and holistic health with a refreshing lack of filter. Freya approaches intimate topics with the warmth and directness of a trusted friend, aiming to provide the kind of practical, compassionate education many never received. Each episode feels like a real chat among real people, blending personal stories, professional insight, and plenty of laughter. The discussions naturally explore how physical, emotional, and cultural dimensions of our lives intersect, all delivered with a down-to-earth Aussie sensibility. Listening to this podcast feels like pulling up a chair for an honest, empowering, and surprisingly funny yarn about the things that matter most in our personal journeys. It’s for anyone curious about deepening their understanding of themselves and their relationships, seeking a blend of grounded advice and genuine connection. Expect to feel both informed and entertained as Freya and her guests navigate the full spectrum of human experience with wit and wisdom.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 185

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