Known Donor, Known Love: Kait, Sophie & Oliver’s Story

Known Donor, Known Love: Kait, Sophie & Oliver’s Story

Author: Jaimie Kelton – Queer Parenting & LGBTQ Families'. April 14, 2025 Duration: 53:20

What happens when your best friend offers to help you make a baby?

Jaimie sits down with Kait and Sophie—two queer folks trying to build their family—and their longtime friend (and now known donor!) Oliver. Together, they open up about the winding road that led them to one another, how a heartfelt email changed everything, and the love, planning, and community it takes to make a family—queer style.

This is not your average family-building journey. From navigating fibroids and reciprocal IVF to creating legal contracts and sharing meals during donation week, their story is bursting with intention, humor, and a deep sense of abundance. They’re redefining what family can look like—and we’re lucky to listen in.

🏳️‍🌈 Thanks to our sponsor California Cryobank!

Thinking of growing your queer family? Use code LOVEISLOVE at cryobank.com for a FREE Level 2 subscription to their donor catalog!

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🏳️‍🌈 Key Takeaways

  • Choosing a known donor over a sperm bank
  • Medical complexities & the fibroid factor
  • Navigating clinics as a queer trio
  • Legal agreements, counseling, and the emotional labor of baby-making
  • The beauty (and messiness) of chosen family


📍 Bonus: Hear how they found joy, built connection, and created space for grandparents, even across donor lines.

🏳️‍🌈 About the Guest(s)🏳️‍🌈

Kait and Sophie are a married queer couple deep in the baby-making process, navigating everything from medical hurdles to donor contracts with heart, humor, and a whole lot of intention. Oliver is their longtime friend (and now known donor!) who offered to help grow their family in the most beautiful, chosen-family kind of way. Together, they’re showing us what queer family building can look like when it’s rooted in care, communication, and abundance.

🏳️‍🌈 Resources Mentioned

  • California Cryobank – Use code: LOVEISLOVE
  • Modern Families: Stories of Extraordinary Journeys to Kinship by Joshua Gamson
  • And Baby Makes More: Known Donors, Queer Parents, and Our Unexpected Families edited by Susan Goldberg and Chloe Brushwood Rose
  • LGBTQIA Family Law Attorneys: Mentioned law firms include Aaron Robinson and Tabitha Coe’s office specializing in queer family planning.d


🏳️‍🌈 What resonated most with you? Drop a comment, DM us, or email thequeerfamilypodcast@gmail.com—we love hearing your stories!


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🏳️‍🌈 Edited by: Jerson Barajas

🏳️‍🌈 Theme Song by: Tiffany Topol

🏳️‍🌈 Logo by: Daneen Stevenato

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🏳️‍🌈 Full transcript & episode info available on our website

🗳️ VOTE. 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ ADVOCATE. 🍼 BUILD QUEER FAMILIES.

The information shared in this episode is for educational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice. Always consult a trusted professional for your specific situation!



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Hosted by queer mom Jaimie Kelton, The Queer Family Podcast-LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories offers a weekly space that is both uproariously funny and deeply genuine. Each episode features conversations with LGBTQIA+ parents, hopeful parents, and their allies, delving into the specific joys and hurdles of building a family outside of traditional frameworks. You’ll hear firsthand accounts of the paths to parenthood-from adoption and fostering to IVF and surrogacy-and the everyday realities of raising kids in a world that can still feel unfamiliar. This podcast moves beyond theory, focusing on lived experiences that cover everything from health and fitness routines that work for queer families to navigating complex conversations about sexuality and society with children. The goal is straightforward: to share stories that normalize these experiences, elevate diverse voices, and celebrate the full spectrum of queer family life. Tuning in means connecting with a community, finding resonance in shared challenges, and gathering a lot of practical wisdom-and laughter-along the way. It’s a resource and a companion for anyone curious about or living within the beautifully expansive definition of a modern family.
Author: Language: en-us Episodes: 100

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