She Grew Up With Two Gay Dads in the 70s—Here's What She Wants Parents to Know

She Grew Up With Two Gay Dads in the 70s—Here's What She Wants Parents to Know

Author: Jaimie Kelton – Queer Parenting & LGBTQ Families'. August 3, 2026 Duration: 48:24

Melissa Pas Blake grew up with two dads—but not in the way many queer families exist today.

After losing her mother to cancer at just six years old, Melissa was raised by her father and his lifelong partner, Ken, throughout the 1970s and 80s, long before LGBTQ+ families had visibility or legal protections.

In this heartfelt conversation, Melissa shares what it was like growing up in a loving home while her dads remained largely closeted, why their relationship wasn't something anyone talked about, and how she eventually came to understand the extraordinary family she'd always had.

Together, Jaimie and Melissa explore what children actually need to thrive, how family is built through consistency and love—not gender—and why representation matters so deeply for the next generation.

They also discuss second-parent adoption before it even had a name, coming out as the child of queer parents, and the lasting impact of growing up in a home filled with safety, joy, and unconditional love.

🏳️‍🌈 Key Takeaways

  • Love—not gender—is what makes a family.
  • Children don't need a "perfect" family; they need to feel safe, loved, and significant.
  • Melissa's childhood offers a rare look at queer family life decades before marriage equality.
  • Second-parent adoption existed long before it became common because queer families have always found ways to protect each other.
  • Growing up with queer parents gave Melissa a broader understanding of love, acceptance, and family.
  • Visibility matters because children of LGBTQ+ parents shouldn't have to carry shame or secrecy about the people they love.
  • Even in difficult historical moments, queer families have always existed—and have always been raising wonderful kids.


🏳️‍🌈 About the guest(s)

Melissa Pas Blake is a clinical hypnotherapist, heart-healing practitioner, and Parkinson's wellness specialist. Raised by her father and his lifelong partner after losing her mother to cancer at age six, Melissa brings the unique perspective of someone who grew up in a loving gay household during the 1970s and 80s. Today, she helps others heal emotional wounds while sharing her family's story to inspire and support LGBTQ+ families everywhere.

🏳️‍🌈 Resources Mentioned

Instagram: @pasitivesolutions/

LinkedIn: Melissa Pas Blake https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissablake2/

Website: pasitivesolutions.com

https://pasitivesolutions.com/homecoming/


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🏳️‍🌈 Edited by: Jerson Barajas 🏳️‍🌈 Theme Song by: Tiffany Topol 🏳️‍🌈 Logo by: Daneen Stevenato 

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Hosted by queer mom Jaimie Kelton, The Queer Family Podcast-LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories offers a weekly space that is both uproariously funny and deeply genuine. Each episode features conversations with LGBTQIA+ parents, hopeful parents, and their allies, delving into the specific joys and hurdles of building a family outside of traditional frameworks. You’ll hear firsthand accounts of the paths to parenthood-from adoption and fostering to IVF and surrogacy-and the everyday realities of raising kids in a world that can still feel unfamiliar. This podcast moves beyond theory, focusing on lived experiences that cover everything from health and fitness routines that work for queer families to navigating complex conversations about sexuality and society with children. The goal is straightforward: to share stories that normalize these experiences, elevate diverse voices, and celebrate the full spectrum of queer family life. Tuning in means connecting with a community, finding resonance in shared challenges, and gathering a lot of practical wisdom-and laughter-along the way. It’s a resource and a companion for anyone curious about or living within the beautifully expansive definition of a modern family.
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