208. The Dangers of Taking Offense, How to Stay in the Mentoring Game for the Long Haul, and Keeping the Main Things the Main Things

208. The Dangers of Taking Offense, How to Stay in the Mentoring Game for the Long Haul, and Keeping the Main Things the Main Things

Author: Zach Garza & You Can Mentor: Faith-Based Mentoring for Churches, Non-Profits, Youth Ministers, and Teachers November 2, 2023 Duration: 43:53

Offense, or taking things personally, is one of the most common tactics the Enemy uses to tear down relationships.  When somebody feels hurt in a relationship, their tendency is to pull away and isolate, which then leads to an even greater rift between the two parties.  This is true for all relationships, but mentoring relationships have the tendency to experience this on a much more frequent scale.  Oftentimes, the mentee is testing the relationship to see exactly how much the mentor will tolerate before they leave.  Because of this, it's so critical that a mentor can navigate the mentoring relationship without taking offense; because offending things WILL happen.  Zach and John are together on the podcast this week to talk through the dangers of taking offense, some practicals on how to avoid becoming offended in the mentoring relationship, how to stay in the mentoring game for the long haul, and what it looks like to focus the relationship on the main things.

Purchase John's Book:
Mephibosheth! The Search for Identity, Purpose, and Community


Purchase the You Can Mentor book:
You Can Mentor: How to Impact Your Community, Fulfill the Great Commission, and Break Generational Curses

youcanmentor.com 


Hosted by Zach Garza, You Can Mentor: A Christian Youth Mentoring Podcast is a conversation for anyone guiding young people within a faith context. This isn't about abstract theory; it's a practical resource built for the real challenges faced by youth ministers, church volunteers, teachers, and parents. Each episode focuses on the tangible aspects of building relationships that matter, offering grounded advice on how to listen, encourage, and walk alongside the next generation. The core of this podcast is a shared belief that effective mentoring flows from a foundation of loving God and loving others, aiming to make disciples right where you live. We delve into the questions you actually have, because your input directly shapes the discussions. Many episodes are crafted from real questions submitted by listeners, making the content immediately relevant to your own mentoring relationships. Whether you're navigating a difficult conversation, seeking creative ways to connect, or looking to sustain your own spiritual health while pouring into others, this space is designed to equip and encourage you. The goal is to see Christian mentors not just manage, but truly thrive in their vital roles. Tune in for honest stories, actionable strategies, and a sense of community, all aimed at helping you cultivate a more meaningful and impactful mentoring practice.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

You Can Mentor: A Christian Youth Mentoring Podcast
Podcast Episodes
241. Earning the Right to be Heard // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 5:38
Earn the Right to Be HeardYou may have heard the saying “a kid doesn’t care what you know until they know that you care.” It is one of my favorite sayings because I think it is 100% accurate. I have seen many mentors get…
240. With > For // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 6:26
With > ForI love youth ministry. I am the product of a healthy youth group from the 80’s and 90’s that loved me well and gave me the chance to realize my identity and purpose within a group of youth workers and teenagers…
239. Ending a Mentoring Relationship // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 7:03
Ending a Mentoring Relationship WellWhat do you do whenever major life circumstances pop up that get in the way of your mentoring relationship?Maybe your mentee goes off to college or moves to a new community?Perhaps you…
238. Kindness // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 9:30
KindnessKindness has that middle-child syndrome. Yes, it’s a fruit of the Spirit. But I think we have a funny relationship with the word. We know that we are to be kind. We know a few people who we would describe as kind…
237. Am I Qualified? // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 5:32
Am I Qualified?When people consider starting a mentoring relationship with a child, one question that seems to always pop up is “Am I qualified?” After all, investing into the life of a child is a big deal.But I think we…
236: Faithfulness Over Fruitfulness // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 6:37
Faithfulness over FruitfulnessEarly on in my mentoring journey, I thought mentoring was like a math equation. A + B = CIf I showed up + Gave them some wisdom = Growth in my menteeIf I’m being honest, in my naivite, I tho…
235: IPC: Community // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 7:16
-IPC is a tool to help us understand our mentee (and ourselves)Identity is WHO WE AREPurpose is WHAT WE DO Community is HOW WE BLESS AND ARE BLESSED BY OTHERSI want to paint a mental picture for you on the canvas of your…
234: IPC: Purpose // Mentoring Minute [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 7:17
-IPC is a tool to help us understand our mentee (and ourselves)Identity is WHO WE AREPurpose is WHAT WE DO Community is HOW WE BLESS AND ARE BLESSED BY OTHERSKing David had a high sense and value for HIS OWN identity, pu…