224. Giving Gifts // Mentoring Minute

224. Giving Gifts // Mentoring Minute

Author: Zach Garza & You Can Mentor: Faith-Based Mentoring for Churches, Non-Profits, Youth Ministers, and Teachers March 14, 2024 Duration: 6:50
You Can Mentor: A Christian Youth Mentoring Podcast
ReligionReligion & SpiritualityChristianityFamilyKidsKids & FamilySpirituality

Giving Gifts


Giving gifts or purchasing things for your mentee is one of the more complicated topics you will face as a mentor. You want to be able to show your care and affection for your mentee through giving gifts, but so often they can become distractions in your mentoring relationship. 


Let me be the first to say that this is a gray topic. It is not black and white. We are just giving you our perspective that we gained through years of mentoring. 


We never want our mentee or their family to:

  • See us as an ATM
  • To hang out with us to get something
  • Confuse our mentee when we don’t give them everything they want


This is especially difficult when the gifts you want to purchase are considered necessary items. 


We have had mentees who:

  • Needed new shoes
  • Needed a bed
  • Needed groceries


When needs like this pop up, we suggest you use your connections to a non-profit organization or a church to partner with your mentee to take care of those needs. We highly recommend building a relationship with other ancillary organizations such as food banks, clothing closets, and churches. 


If you want to provide basic items, we’re ok with that, as long as the mentee and their family know it’s coming from someone other than you. This is a benefit to mentoring with a specific organization - they can be the fall guy when someone asks you for a gift. You can blame it on them. 


But there is a difference between a want and a need. 


We recommend that you do not purchase your mentee anything with the exception of a birthday present. We recommend that you place a $25 cap on the birthday gift that you purchase. An occasional purchasing of food and treats is another thing. Perhaps you want to take your mentee to a game or movie. Those are ok as long as you follow the rule of three and you make sure it doesn’t turn into something the mentee expects. 


Your presence is enough. Obviously this is assuming basic needs are being provided, the best gift you can give your mentee is love and relationship. 

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Please follow @youcanmentor on social media and give us a 5 star rating! If you are a part of a mentoring organization, we'd love to get to know you! Please reach out to us and we can spotlight your org on the pod or on our website. 

Contact us at zach@youcanmentor.com or at www.youcanmentor.com.


Hosted by Zach Garza, You Can Mentor: A Christian Youth Mentoring Podcast is a conversation for anyone guiding young people within a faith context. This isn't about abstract theory; it's a practical resource built for the real challenges faced by youth ministers, church volunteers, teachers, and parents. Each episode focuses on the tangible aspects of building relationships that matter, offering grounded advice on how to listen, encourage, and walk alongside the next generation. The core of this podcast is a shared belief that effective mentoring flows from a foundation of loving God and loving others, aiming to make disciples right where you live. We delve into the questions you actually have, because your input directly shapes the discussions. Many episodes are crafted from real questions submitted by listeners, making the content immediately relevant to your own mentoring relationships. Whether you're navigating a difficult conversation, seeking creative ways to connect, or looking to sustain your own spiritual health while pouring into others, this space is designed to equip and encourage you. The goal is to see Christian mentors not just manage, but truly thrive in their vital roles. Tune in for honest stories, actionable strategies, and a sense of community, all aimed at helping you cultivate a more meaningful and impactful mentoring practice.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

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