Overcoming a false start

Overcoming a false start

Author: Jane Beddall February 20, 2025 Duration: 4:36

A false start in a conflict situation can appear in different ways. We can create a conflict where none existed or when we make a good faith attempt to resolve a conflict. Of course, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. A concept so fundamental that it was the focus of Episode 11, way back on March 13, 2019.  But if a false start has occurred, remember and take advantage of the fact of the false start – emphasis on “start”. So, let’s start over. If you made an honest mistake, try an old-fashioned apology. Explain, if you can, what went wrong.   If the other person refuses to engage with you and says so, consider offering a cooling-off period of some specific duration.  An agreement to try again at a certain time or date. Take a break, a breather, a pause.  If it’s just crickets, no response at all, think about a good length for a breather – from your perspective and the other person’s, too – and pick it. Take the initiative to try again at the end of that pause.   It’s just the start. Too soon to give up. Worth it to try again and do what you can to set up for a better result. 

Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at jb@dovetailresolutions.com! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.Enjoy the show for free on your favorite podcast app or on the podcast website: https://craftingsolutionstoconflict.com/

 


In a world where disagreements often feel like dead ends, Crafting Solutions to Conflict offers a different path-one built on practical tools and a genuinely constructive mindset. Hosted by Jane Beddall, whose background in both law and mediation brings a unique depth to the conversation, this podcast moves beyond theory to the everyday realities of navigating tension. You’ll hear discussions that reframe conflict not as something to dread, but as a potential catalyst for stronger connections and better outcomes, whether at home, in the workplace, or within your community. Each episode feels like a thoughtful dialogue, unpacking familiar yet challenging concepts. Jane guides listeners through ideas like addressing the ‘elephants in the room,’ finding ways to ‘expand the pie’ for mutual gain, and understanding why ‘cookie-cutter’ solutions often fall short. The focus is consistently on preserving valued relationships by preventing unnecessary damage and resolving issues that do arise with clarity and respect. Tuning into this podcast provides more than just advice; it’s an ongoing exploration of how to build and restore harmony through intentional communication. If you’re looking for actionable perspectives that blend wisdom from the realms of society, business, and personal growth, you’ll find a trusted resource here.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Crafting Solutions to Conflict
Podcast Episodes
Can you or should you "control your emotions"? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 4:14
The idea that we can control our emotions is both unrealistic and potentially damaging. We can try to shut them down or bury them. But they won’t go away. They can corrode or explode. Better to make sure that our emotion…
The challenge of being humble or gracious [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 4:27
It’s good advice to “be humble in victory and gracious in defeat”, a phrase credited to Chrisopher Earle. Humble: no gloating, no mocking. Gracious: accepting the outcome, no blaming those who enforce the rules fairly, n…
Empathy, sympathy, and pity [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 3:41
Empathy is demonstrating an understanding of another person's feelings and needs. Sympathy shows concern for another person’s misfortune, but not necessarily with the same connection. Pity can be sympathy with judgment o…
John Ford on The Empathy Set [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 28:23
John Ford is a seasoned mediator. He also describes himself as the purveyor of The Empathy Set. These are tools to help answer the fundamental questions that so often lie behind conflict: What are we feeling and what are…
Noticing conflict patterns – location [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 4:33
When we are in ongoing relationships, such as those in an extended family or family enterprise, we should be on the lookout for conflict patterns. Is there a pattern to when we frequently end up in a bad conflict? A loca…
Noticing conflict patterns – timing [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 4:35
When we are in ongoing relationships in an extended family or family enterprise, we should be on the lookout for patterns. Is there a pattern to when we frequently end up in a bad conflict? Which is probably easier to no…
Episode 300 of Crafting Solutions to Conflict [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 5:50
Most podcasts don’t last as long as mine. Some recent statistics are available here: Podcastpage.io https://bit.ly/3THcApJ. Why have I been publishing every week for five and a half years?! I think it breaks down to thre…
Kristin Keffeler on The Myth of the Silver Spoon [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 30:46
Kristin Keffler joins me for this episode. Kristin is the author of The Myth of the Silver Spoon: Navigating Family Wealth & Creating an Impactful Life. We talk about Kristin’s personal, educational, and professional jou…
The dangers of shorthand [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 3:22
Last time, I talked about the alure of a common language. On the plus side, this shorthandsaves time. A common phrase conveys meaning quickly.When I use it, I demonstrate that I know the lingo of this group. We feel a se…