Threats and Bribes Aren't Very Helpful (What to Do Instead)

Threats and Bribes Aren't Very Helpful (What to Do Instead)

Author: JLML Press December 23, 2025 Duration: 23:11
A parent wants to get out of a cycle of bribing her 3.5-year old and writes to Janet for help. “It seems that in order to get him to do anything, I have to offer a reward, treat, or special outing.” If these strategies don’t work, she says, she will threaten to take something away. This mom admits that she is a people pleaser, so when she does set a boundary, she feels guilty about it. She worries that she’s teaching this to her son. “I don’t want him to feel guilty about his feelings or his boundaries.” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Drawing from over twenty-five years of hands-on experience, Janet Lansbury brings a grounded, compassionate voice to the often chaotic world of raising children. Her Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled podcast, presented by JLML Press, isn't about quick fixes or following a strict rulebook. Instead, each conversation takes a real question or struggle from a parent and explores it with depth and empathy. What you'll hear is a thoughtful discussion that reframes common challenges-from tantrums to power struggles to sibling rivalry-through the principles of respectful parenting. Janet’s approach consistently moves the focus away from seeking control and toward understanding the child's perspective and fostering a genuine connection. This isn't about memorizing scripts or employing tactics; it's about a fundamental shift in how we see our children and ourselves within the family dynamic. Tuning into this podcast feels like having a wise, calm consultant in your ear, offering clarity and practical insights that empower you to respond with more confidence and less reactivity. The discussions in every episode aim to replace frustration with understanding, providing parents with a sustainable framework that honors both the child's development and the parent's need for a more peaceful home.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled
Podcast Episodes
5 Daily Discipline Reminders [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 32:10
Wouldn’t parenting be easier if our kids’ behavior was always stellar? Unfortunately, for most of us that isn't the case. It is during those difficult times especially, when our child is tired or hungry or angry (or thei…
How to Calm Ourselves (With Mr. Chazz) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 43:43
By now, we’ve all heard that Step One for effectively addressing our kids' behaviors and emotional storms is to first calm ourselves. Sounds simple, but as Janet has often shared, she believes this to be the biggest chal…
When Our Kids Seem Troubled by Our Emotions and Moods [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 22:47
In this encore episode, a parent writes that she and her husband are concerned their toddler feels responsible for their emotions. This is a trait they both recognize from their own backgrounds. “He asks again and again,…
Erratic, Unreasonable Behavior [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 29:11
A mother reaches out to Janet because her 3-year old's behavior has recently become erratic and unpleasant, and she’s struggling to make sense of it. She writes that her boy is strong-willed, smart, kind, high energy and…
Less Stress, More Joy This Holiday Season (With Ashlee Eiland) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 41:43
Does the holiday season really need to be so overwhelming? Janet admits she gets caught up in the bustle and excitement of holiday festivities. While her intention every year is to pare down to make more room for meaning…
My Life With Adult Kids [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 22:53
Does respectful parenting work? How does it look as our kids get older and more independent? Does our approach to relationship building change and if so, how? Will our early efforts pay off? In response to a listener's q…
When Kids Don't Seem Motivated (to Potty, Crawl, or Create) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 35:07
What do we do if we know our kids can practice a new skill, and yet they don't or won't? Three families reach out to Janet with concerns about their children's developmental progress. In one case, a 12-month-old doesn't…
"Earlier Is Better" And Other Child Development Myths (with Rae Pica) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 31:31
In this encore episode, early childhood education luminary Rae Pica joins Janet to share her expertise about how children really learn and to debunk some common parenting myths that can impede a child’s natural developme…
Kids Don't Need Intensive Parenting (and Neither do We!) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 34:08
The US Surgeon General warns that parents today are feeling increasingly stressed and burnt out. Obviously, this is unhealthy for us and for our children. Several societal factors are thought to contribute to this issue.…
Is Disrespect a Tantrum in Disguise? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 32:05
A 7-year-old has been behaving rudely toward his parents by giving them "attitude" and resisting when they give him directions. He says rebellious things, reacts strongly to minor disappointments, and even gets physicall…