Threats and Bribes Aren't Very Helpful (What to Do Instead)

Threats and Bribes Aren't Very Helpful (What to Do Instead)

Author: JLML Press December 23, 2025 Duration: 23:11
A parent wants to get out of a cycle of bribing her 3.5-year old and writes to Janet for help. “It seems that in order to get him to do anything, I have to offer a reward, treat, or special outing.” If these strategies don’t work, she says, she will threaten to take something away. This mom admits that she is a people pleaser, so when she does set a boundary, she feels guilty about it. She worries that she’s teaching this to her son. “I don’t want him to feel guilty about his feelings or his boundaries.” Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Drawing from over twenty-five years of hands-on experience, Janet Lansbury brings a grounded, compassionate voice to the often chaotic world of raising children. Her Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled podcast, presented by JLML Press, isn't about quick fixes or following a strict rulebook. Instead, each conversation takes a real question or struggle from a parent and explores it with depth and empathy. What you'll hear is a thoughtful discussion that reframes common challenges-from tantrums to power struggles to sibling rivalry-through the principles of respectful parenting. Janet’s approach consistently moves the focus away from seeking control and toward understanding the child's perspective and fostering a genuine connection. This isn't about memorizing scripts or employing tactics; it's about a fundamental shift in how we see our children and ourselves within the family dynamic. Tuning into this podcast feels like having a wise, calm consultant in your ear, offering clarity and practical insights that empower you to respond with more confidence and less reactivity. The discussions in every episode aim to replace frustration with understanding, providing parents with a sustainable framework that honors both the child's development and the parent's need for a more peaceful home.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Respectful Parenting: Janet Lansbury Unruffled
Podcast Episodes
What's Too Strict? What's Not Strict Enough? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 33:31
Parenting is a tough job and, if you're like many of us, navigating effective discipline is the most challenging part of it. We need clarity! For this reason, many have appreciated Janet's recent episode: "Strict is Lovi…
Character Building Lessons You Want Your Kids to Learn [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 31:21
Progress not perfection… Be thankful for what you have… It's okay not to win… Embrace differences... Follow your own path... It's okay to cry... We all have life lessons that we hope to instill in our kids. Many of you s…
Strict Is Loving [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 34:50
Janet's "all feelings allowed" approach to parenting is sometimes misconstrued as permissive, passive, lax on boundaries. But as Janet clarifies in this episode, the exact opposite is true! She describes how acquiescing…
Everything Upsets My Spirited Toddler (A Parent Consultation) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 46:13
Janet consults with a single mom who is alarmed by her toddler's strong reactions and aggressive behavior. She seems easily and almost constantly upset—hits, pushes, and bites her mother and brother—and won't be consoled…
3 Ways to Calm Back-to-School Jitters [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 23:01
Starting a new school, going back to school, or starting daycare is one of the most challenging transitions for our kids —and us—at this early stage of their lives. It means a new routine, new caregivers and friends, and…
Baffled by "Bad" Behavior? Do This First [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 26:38
When our kids' behavior seems negative or inappropriate, we know we should disallow it. But what if the behavior continues? Or goes from bad to worse? What is our child needing from us or telling us that we're missing? T…
The Scoop on Independent Play (And Myths That Get in the Way) [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 27:40
Children are innately driven to play, and the benefits are enormous. They're also driven to seek our attention and connection, so how can we encourage our kids' play without becoming their constant playmate? In this epis…