Why are we Really Building a Startup

Why are we Really Building a Startup

Author: Startups.com May 11, 2026 Duration: 33:43

What are you really trying to fix by building this company—and what happens when you finally admit it? The conversation unpacks how founders often default to a public “change the world” story while their private motive is something more personal like safety, control, validation, belonging, autonomy, or even revenge. When that real why stays hidden, decisions get miscalibrated and founders chase the hardest possible path (like massive VC rounds) even when a smaller outcome might satisfy the true need. They discuss how these motives “leak out,” especially after selling a company and realizing you’re no longer needed, and why success (even IPO-level) rarely erases old wounds. The key is naming the motive, right-sizing the plan to it (“minimum viable ego”), and building a deliberate version of success that fits what you’re actually optimizing for.

00:00 Founders Lie to Themselves
01:53 Public Why vs Private Motive
02:58 Freudian Roots of Drive
03:37 Will’s Safety and Control Story
07:11 When the Why Leaks Out
07:35 Selling and Not Being Needed
09:57 Validation as True North
12:01 Ryan’s North Star Revealed
13:45 Will’s Revenge and Proving
16:07 Steve Jobs Still Hurt
17:57 Haters And Criticism
18:44 Minimum Viable Ego
19:29 Different Success Thresholds
20:47 Stop Trying To Prove Them
21:22 Pick The Right Vehicle
22:05 The Villain You Invent
23:45 Success Doesnt Fix You
29:17 Money And Marriage Myths
30:25 Alignment Over Ego Death
31:03 Autonomy As The Real Goal
32:34 Own Your Motivation

Resources:
Startup Therapy Podcast
https://www.startups.com/community/startup-therapy
Website
https://www.startups.com/begin
LinkedIn
https://www.linkedin.com/company/startups-co/

Join our Network of Top Founders
Wil Schroter
https://www.linkedin.com/in/wilschroter/
Ryan Rutan
https://www.linkedin.com/in/ryan-rutan/


Building a company is far more chaotic and personal than any business school case study lets on. Startup Therapy from Startups.com digs into that reality, moving past polished success stories to focus on the raw, unvarnished journey. Hosts Wil Schroter and Ryan Rutan, who have each navigated these trenches themselves, lead conversations that feel more like essential conversations between founders than a standard interview show. They tackle the specific pressures that come with trying to transform an idea into something meaningful-the financial strain, the team dynamics, the personal sacrifices, and the frequent moments of doubt that rarely make the keynote speech. This podcast operates on a simple premise: the best guidance comes from those who have been there, not from abstract theory. Each episode is a candid session, dissecting the professional hurdles and the intense emotional toll that founders manage daily. You’ll hear direct talk about fundraising fails, partnership conflicts, burnout, and the small victories that keep everything moving forward. It’s a resource for anyone in the thick of building something, offering practical perspectives and a sense of shared experience when the path gets especially tough. The dialogue is straightforward and focused on actionable insight, providing a genuine look at the resilience required to change the world, one startup at a time.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

Startup Therapy
Podcast Episodes
Can Startups Be a Team of One? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 43:05
What happens if building a startup no longer requires a team? The conversation explores how AI is rapidly turning the classic “product + developer + marketer” founding trio into an optional choice, making one-person comp…
We Rarely "Control" Our Startups [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 46:35
Worried about “losing control” because of dilution? This episode breaks down why equity is a poor proxy for control in startups: the cap table splits money, while control is defined by decision rights in the operating ag…
Founders Need Finish Lines [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 38:33
Ever feel like you hit a milestone in your startup and immediately get handed the next problem? The episode explores why startup work rarely delivers a true sense of “done,” how founders get trapped by the arrival fallac…
What Should My Expectations Be? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 47:47
Ever feel like you’re working nonstop and still falling behind? The discussion argues founder happiness and decision-making improve fastest by recalibrating expectations, because “happiness = reality ÷ expectations.” Usi…
What Actually Happens When A Founder Runs Out of Gas? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 34:11
What do you think really happens if you burn out and step away for a minute? The conversation breaks down how founders often imagine an apocalyptic chain reaction—customers leaving, the team collapsing, investors panicki…
The Value of Distraction [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 35:04
What if the thing that looks like a distraction is actually the move that saves your startup? This episode breaks down why the “stay focused at all costs” advice can be risky when you’re still figuring out what actually…
Master Failure [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 36:07
What if failure isn’t something to avoid, but a skill to master? This episode breaks down why startups can’t be built on certainty—new markets, new products, and new teams mean you’re guaranteed to be wrong a lot. The go…
We Can't Predict the Future Anymore [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 37:36
Is AI truly the game-changer for startups, or does it bring unexpected chaos? This episode dives into how AI is transforming forecasting, marketing, product development, employment, and investment in the startup ecosyste…
We wanted efficiency. We got isolation. [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 41:45
How has the relentless pursuit of efficiency, aided by tools like remote work, Zoom, Slack, and AI, affected our human connections? In this episode, we're exploring the cost of optimized workflows on our humanity. We del…
Are startups the future of employment? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 47:03
What will AI do to everything? In this episode, we explore how AI is set to create a surge in new startups, reshaping employment as we know it. As jobs get displaced, the concept of big employment shifts, giving rise to…