Known Donor, Reciprocal IVF & Three Kids Later | Vanessa & Jory

Known Donor, Reciprocal IVF & Three Kids Later | Vanessa & Jory

Author: Jaimie Kelton – Queer Parenting & LGBTQ Families'. June 4, 2026 Duration: 51:37

Vanessa and Jory of @modernfamilynextdoor join the Pride Extravaganza to share their journey from closeted college classmates to raising three children together. They open up about religious shame, coming out to family, known donor conception, reciprocal IVF, difficult pregnancies, and the emotional realities of non-bio parenting in queer families. This conversation is funny, vulnerable, and deeply relatable for anyone navigating LGBTQ family building.

🏳️‍🌈 Key Takeaways

  • Vanessa and Jory share how growing up religious shaped their experiences with internalized homophobia and delayed coming out.
  • The couple discusses falling in love after meeting in college — despite both initially trying to avoid their attraction to women.
  • They open up about coming out to family members, navigating acceptance, and the emotional impact of feeling like they might lose family relationships.
  • Vanessa and Jory explain how they built their family through known donor conception and later expanded their family through reciprocal IVF.
  • The conversation explores the unique emotional realities of non-bio parenting in queer families, including fears around bonding and identity.
  • Vanessa shares the painful assumptions strangers made about her relationship to her son because she is Mexican and her son is white with red hair.
  • They discuss how little information and representation existed for LGBTQ+ families when they first started trying to conceive in 2015.
  • The episode highlights the intentionality, resilience, and complexity that often comes with queer family building.


🏳️‍🌈 About the guest(s)

Vanessa and Jory are the creators behind @modernfamilynextdoor where they share the realities of raising a queer family online with honesty, humor, and heart. Through their content, Vanessa and Jory have become a source of visibility and representation for other LGBTQ+ families navigating similar journeys.


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Hosted by queer mom Jaimie Kelton, The Queer Family Podcast-LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories offers a weekly space that is both uproariously funny and deeply genuine. Each episode features conversations with LGBTQIA+ parents, hopeful parents, and their allies, delving into the specific joys and hurdles of building a family outside of traditional frameworks. You’ll hear firsthand accounts of the paths to parenthood-from adoption and fostering to IVF and surrogacy-and the everyday realities of raising kids in a world that can still feel unfamiliar. This podcast moves beyond theory, focusing on lived experiences that cover everything from health and fitness routines that work for queer families to navigating complex conversations about sexuality and society with children. The goal is straightforward: to share stories that normalize these experiences, elevate diverse voices, and celebrate the full spectrum of queer family life. Tuning in means connecting with a community, finding resonance in shared challenges, and gathering a lot of practical wisdom-and laughter-along the way. It’s a resource and a companion for anyone curious about or living within the beautifully expansive definition of a modern family.
Author: Language: en-us Episodes: 100

The Queer Family Podcast – LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories
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