Kirsty Loehr: From Reciprocal IVF  to Blended Family and Writing Our History

Kirsty Loehr: From Reciprocal IVF to Blended Family and Writing Our History

Author: Jaimie Kelton – Queer Parenting & LGBTQ Families'. November 10, 2025 Duration: 38:34

Author and educator Kirsty Loehr joins Jaimie to share her beautifully messy story of queer family building — from reciprocal IVF with her ex-wife to co-parenting their 4-year-old son and now navigating life in a blended family with her new partner and her partner’s two kids.

Kirsty talks candidly about the breakup that came just months after welcoming her son, the challenges of 50/50 custody, and learning to blend families while balancing love, chaos, and new beginnings. She also shares the inspiration behind her new book, A Short History of Queer Parenting, a funny, accessible, and essential look at how queer families have always existed — even when history tried to erase us.

It’s honest, hopeful, and very, very lesbian.

🏳️‍🌈 Key Takeaways

  • Reciprocal IVF and Family Dynamics: Kirsty shares her experiences with reciprocal IVF, offering insights into queer parenting and the unique challenges and triumphs they bring.
  • Single and Blended Parenting: Insights into the evolution from single to blended parenting, discussing both the struggles and profound bonds formed.
  • Legal Aspects of Queer Parenting: Legal navigation within queer parenting, particularly regarding reciprocal IVF and parental rights.
  • The Evolution of Queer Parenting: Kirsty's new book highlights the historical journey of LGBTQ+ parenting, from legality issues to personal anecdotes, providing a comprehensive view of queer family growth.
  • Strength in Community: The importance of shared experiences and community support in navigating the complexities of queer family life.


🏳️‍🌈 About the Guest(s)🏳️‍🌈

  • Kirsty Loehr (she/her) is a writer, English teacher, and examiner based in Brighton, England. She’s the author of A Short History of Queer Parenting and A Short History of Queer Women. Her work celebrates queer lineage, visibility, and the many ways LGBTQIA+ people create and nurture families.


🏳️‍🌈 Thanks to our sponsor California Cryobank!

If you’re listening to this show, there’s a good chance you’re building your family the queer way — and might need a little help in the sperm department. 🩵 Use code QUEERFAM25 at cryobank.com for a FREE Level 2 subscription to their donor catalog!

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🏳️‍🌈 Resources Mentioned


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🏳️‍🌈 Edited by: Jerson Barajas 🏳️‍🌈 Theme Song by: Tiffany Topol 🏳️‍🌈 Logo by: Daneen Stevenato 🏳️‍🌈 Shop merch here. 🏳️‍🌈 Full transcript & episode info available on our website


🗳️ VOTE. 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ ADVOCATE. 🍼 BUILD QUEER FAMILIES.

The information shared in this episode is for educational purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice. Always consult a trusted professional for your specific situation!



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Every family has a story, but the paths taken by LGBTQIA+ parents are often uniquely creative, filled with both profound joy and specific hurdles. The Queer Family Podcast-LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories is a weekly space where those narratives take center stage. Host Jaimie Kelton, a queer mom herself, guides conversations that are as laugh-out-loud funny as they are deeply moving. Each episode features candid interviews with a diverse range of guests, all sharing the intimate details of how they built their families-from adoption and fostering to IVF, surrogacy, and co-parenting. You’ll hear how these families navigate school systems, healthcare, and everyday social situations, tackling challenges with resilience and humor. This podcast digs into the real stuff of queer family life, covering topics across parenting, health, fitness, and sexuality, all through an authentic LGBTQ lens. The goal isn’t just to share stories; it’s to normalize and celebrate the beautiful spectrum of ways to create a home. Tune in for a sense of community, practical insights, and a powerful reminder that family is about love, in all its forms.
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