The Losses No One Talks About When You Come Out

The Losses No One Talks About When You Come Out

Author: Anne-Marie Zanzal 1ac1f670-c17c-11f0-806a-ef1502adef07 March 6, 2026 Duration: 51:23

Coming Out & Beyond has evolved.

This season is now exclusively for women questioning their sexuality, coming out later in life, and creating a life beyond—at a human pace, with honesty and community.

And if you found yourself here… you’re exactly where you’re meant to be.

If something in you has been quietly asking a question you haven't said out loud yet —

there's a free guide for exactly this moment.

No answers required. Just an honest place to begin.

Download our Maybe I Am Not Straight Guide

In this episode, I’m joined by Anna Empey—business development consultant, LGBTQ+ coach, and someone who understands (personally and professionally) what it means to rebuild identity after a life-changing awakening.

Together, we talk about grief—not just as something that happens when someone dies, but as our emotional, physical, intellectual, and spiritual response to any loss:

  1. the identity you thought you were
  2. the life you imagined you’d have
  3. relationships shifting (or ending) after coming out
  4. the “good” changes that still carry real loss
  5. the way unprocessed grief quietly stacks over time

We also get practical. We talk about why community matters so much in this chapter—because when we’re isolated, our brains fill in the gaps… and they rarely fill them with kindness.

This conversation is steady, honest, and deeply human.

If you’ve been carrying a quiet ache you can’t quite name… this one will land.

Watch Episode 10 on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube now: https://youtu.be/DnrRcKN8oT4

Go listen on the Coming Out & Beyond YouTube channel and join us in the comments—tell us what part hit home for you.

🔗 CONNECT WITH US

Website: annemariezanzal.com

Facebook: facebook.com/amzanzal

Instagram: @annemariezanzalcoaching

Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment

Ready to start your own journey? Book a free discovery call: https://calendly.com/annemariezanzalcoachingllc/30-minute-clarity-and-fit


💬 JOIN THE AUTHENTICALLY US COMMUNITY

Authentically Us is a support community for later-in-life LGBTQ women at all stages of the coming out and beyond process. Whether you're deconstructing messages from a conservative faith tradition, experiencing divorce-related guilt, or struggling with feelings of shame around your coming out or sexual identity, Authentically Us has the right kind of support for you.

Monthly subscription: $39/month

👉 Join Authentically Us


#ComingOutAndBeyond #LaterInLifeLesbian #LateBloomerLesbian #QuestioningSexuality #CompHet #ReligiousTrauma #PurityCulture #QueerWomen #ComingOutLaterInLife #MidlifeAwakening #LGBTQPodcast #QueerHealing #GriefWork #GriefAndLoss #IdentityShift #NervousSystemRegulation #Authenticity #SelfTrust #QueerCommunity #MightyNetworks


It can feel incredibly isolating to question your sexuality after years of living a different story. Coming Out & Beyond Support for Women Questioning Their Sexuality Later in Life is a companion for that specific journey, created for those who find themselves navigating these waters from a place of established life-perhaps within a marriage, after a divorce, or while building a family. Host Anne-Marie Zanzal brings her perspective as an ordained minister and hospice chaplain to conversations that gently unravel complex layers of identity, faith, and fear. This podcast delves into the real, often unspoken challenges: confronting compulsory heterosexuality, processing religious or spiritual conditioning, and managing the anxiety of how a personal revelation might ripple through your closest relationships. Episodes offer a blend of personal reflection, insightful interviews, and practical support, focusing on emotional and mental well-being without offering simplistic answers. It’s a space where you can hear stories that resonate with your own, fostering a sense of clarity and community. Tuning in, you’ll find a resource that honors the full spectrum of this experience-the confusion, the liberation, and everything in between-always grounded in compassion and deep understanding.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

Coming Out & Beyond | Support for Women Questioning Their Sexuality
Podcast Episodes
Should You Run? Unfiltered Sapphic Dating Advice [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 52:02
This month on Coming Out and Beyond it is our monthly dating and relationship show, and Anne-Marie is joined by her co-coach Barbara Rowlandson, a psychotherapist and dating coach, and her wife Tonda McKay. Before the qu…
🚩 The Signs We Only See Now: Were We Ever Really Straight? [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 42:00
This month's episode with Anna Empey is the one we have all earned after a tender chapter of heavier conversations. It is lighter, there is a lot of laughing, and it is about the signs. Not the ones we noticed at the tim…
Straight Women Don't Lie Awake Wondering if They're Gay [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 51:22
This is the start of something new. The episodes you have told us you love most are the ones where the three of us sit down together, so we are making them a monthly gathering. Once a month, Tonda, Barbara, and I will op…
Coming Out at 39: When the Puzzle Pieces Finally Fit [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 41:53
Some mornings change everything. Marissa Mitchell was 39, a teacher and army veteran in southern Indiana, married to her junior high sweetheart and quietly certain that the distance she felt in her marriage was a problem…
High Libidos, Straight Girl Crushes & Coming Out Later [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 46:14
It is the second Friday of the month, which means Anne-Marie is back with the company she loves most: her fellow coach Barbara Rowlandson and her wife Tonda McKay. This is the monthly conversation so many of you tell us…
How to Stop Letting Fear Run Your Life [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 31:57
What if fear is not a stop sign but a signal that you are growing?In this month's first Friday conversation, Anne-Marie is joined by regular guest Anna Empey, business development consultant and LGBTQ+ coach, for an hone…
The Boy Who Skated Anyway: Stef Vachon's Story [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 40:45
Content note: This conversation includes language that references homophobic slurs and a discussion of suicidal ideation and mental health struggles. Please listen with care, and reach out for support if you need it.What…
Real Talk on Sapphic Dating and Relationships [not-audio_url] [/not-audio_url]

Duration: 55:08
It is the second Friday of the month, which means Anne-Marie is joined by dating coach Barbara Rowlandson and Nashville photographer Tonda McKay, to talk all things sapphic dating and relationships. This month the trio t…