Episode 475: Am I too loyal to my big tech job and politely preserving time

Episode 475: Am I too loyal to my big tech job and politely preserving time

Author: Jamison Dance and Dave Smith August 25, 2025 Duration: 33:26

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

  1. Hi!

    I’m currently working for a big tech company and I’ve just accepted an internal transfer to another team. At the same time, an external company reached out, offering me a job for a role I’m interested in and twice my current compensation.

    I’m not sure what to do. The offer from the new company is very interesting and I wouldn’t think twice at accepting it if I still was in my old team. But now that I’ve accepted the internal transfer, I don’t know what’s best for my career: stay with my current company and lose out on a great offer, or go with the new company but likely burn bridges with my current manager, possibly closing off future opportunities to return to my current company (something that I’m open to in the future)?

  2. How do I politely but firmly stop a project manager colleague, who has vast open plains in their calendar compared to my Tetris-stacked week as a senior software engineer, from parking themselves at my desk for 45-minute vent sessions about everything that’s frustrating them about our project? It’s never just the weather; it’s a full-blown TED Talk on their annoyances, which makes me feel defensive and frustrated in return. I’ve tried the headphones-on-and-look-intently-at-the-screen-approach, and sitting on the other side of the office, booking a smaller meeting room to hide, and carrying on working as they tell me about their troubles with both leadership and members of my team. Nothing seems to work. They find me every time. Is there a way to escape without faking my own death or staging an office fire drill? Thanks!


The weekly advice Soft Skills Engineering podcast, hosted by Jamison Dance and Dave Smith, operates on a simple but profound premise: writing excellent code is only one part of a successful career. The real challenges-and opportunities-often lie in everything else. This is a show dedicated entirely to the human side of software development. Each episode tackles the messy, complicated, and frequently unspoken questions that developers face daily. You’ll hear thoughtful discussions and practical advice on navigating office politics, having difficult conversations with managers, negotiating salaries, managing time and energy, collaborating effectively on a team, and building a sustainable, long-term career without burning out. It’s the crucial curriculum that most computer science degrees never cover. Jamison and Dave bring a blend of experience, empathy, and humor to these topics, offering perspectives that are both actionable and relatable. For anyone who has ever wondered how to handle a toxic coworker, get promoted, or simply find more fulfillment in their work, this podcast provides a much-needed forum. It’s a consistent source of guidance for the parts of the job that don’t involve a compiler, reminding listeners that their growth as a professional is inextricably linked to their growth as a communicator, a colleague, and a person. Tune in for honest conversations that go beyond the technical screen.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 100

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