Episode 493: My boss one-ups my negativity and football engineering

Episode 493: My boss one-ups my negativity and football engineering

Author: Jamison Dance and Dave Smith December 29, 2025 Duration: 21:01

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

  1. Hey Guys, long time listener, first time asker!

    At my BigCorp Co., whenever I talk to my skip level about my concerns, it seems we are playing the ‘Gloom Olympics’ every time we meet. I’ll mention I worked late, and he’ll counter with, ‘That’s nothing, I haven’t slept in three days!’

    This repeated lack of empathy is demotivating and I don’t think I have had a fruitful discussion with him.

    How can I tackle this? How can I feel heard?

  2. I’ve decided to leave my current job as a software engineer at a large retail chain. This is my first out of university, and I’ve been here three years.

    I’m interviewing for two other jobs: one as an engineer at another large retail chain on a team, and another at a world renowned European football club.

    That job would be very different. I’d be the first internal dev hire ever, and I was told I should expect no other devs to get hired for 2+ years. I’d write my own tickets and review my own prs. The project would be to build a dashboard to manage the players - drug testing, injuries, rosters - internally.

    What should I do? Feedback & mentorship were central to my growth at my current job. I won’t have that at the sports club. My concern is I go to the football team, drink a lot of beer & have a great time, but after 3 years of being my own boss, I’ll think I’m the greatest dev ever but really not have kept up to date with modern trends, forgotten how to take feedback, and written a lot of 💩 code.


The weekly advice Soft Skills Engineering podcast, hosted by Jamison Dance and Dave Smith, operates on a simple but profound premise: writing excellent code is only one part of a successful career. The real challenges-and opportunities-often lie in everything else. This is a show dedicated entirely to the human side of software development. Each episode tackles the messy, complicated, and frequently unspoken questions that developers face daily. You’ll hear thoughtful discussions and practical advice on navigating office politics, having difficult conversations with managers, negotiating salaries, managing time and energy, collaborating effectively on a team, and building a sustainable, long-term career without burning out. It’s the crucial curriculum that most computer science degrees never cover. Jamison and Dave bring a blend of experience, empathy, and humor to these topics, offering perspectives that are both actionable and relatable. For anyone who has ever wondered how to handle a toxic coworker, get promoted, or simply find more fulfillment in their work, this podcast provides a much-needed forum. It’s a consistent source of guidance for the parts of the job that don’t involve a compiler, reminding listeners that their growth as a professional is inextricably linked to their growth as a communicator, a colleague, and a person. Tune in for honest conversations that go beyond the technical screen.
Author: Language: English Episodes: 50

Soft Skills Engineering
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