Known Donor, Reciprocal IVF & Three Kids Later | Vanessa & Jory

Known Donor, Reciprocal IVF & Three Kids Later | Vanessa & Jory

Author: Jaimie Kelton – Queer Parenting & LGBTQ Families'. June 4, 2026 Duration: 51:37

Vanessa and Jory of @modernfamilynextdoor join the Pride Extravaganza to share their journey from closeted college classmates to raising three children together. They open up about religious shame, coming out to family, known donor conception, reciprocal IVF, difficult pregnancies, and the emotional realities of non-bio parenting in queer families. This conversation is funny, vulnerable, and deeply relatable for anyone navigating LGBTQ family building.

🏳️‍🌈 Key Takeaways

  • Vanessa and Jory share how growing up religious shaped their experiences with internalized homophobia and delayed coming out.
  • The couple discusses falling in love after meeting in college — despite both initially trying to avoid their attraction to women.
  • They open up about coming out to family members, navigating acceptance, and the emotional impact of feeling like they might lose family relationships.
  • Vanessa and Jory explain how they built their family through known donor conception and later expanded their family through reciprocal IVF.
  • The conversation explores the unique emotional realities of non-bio parenting in queer families, including fears around bonding and identity.
  • Vanessa shares the painful assumptions strangers made about her relationship to her son because she is Mexican and her son is white with red hair.
  • They discuss how little information and representation existed for LGBTQ+ families when they first started trying to conceive in 2015.
  • The episode highlights the intentionality, resilience, and complexity that often comes with queer family building.


🏳️‍🌈 About the guest(s)

Vanessa and Jory are the creators behind @modernfamilynextdoor where they share the realities of raising a queer family online with honesty, humor, and heart. Through their content, Vanessa and Jory have become a source of visibility and representation for other LGBTQ+ families navigating similar journeys.


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🏳️‍🌈 Edited by: Jerson Barajas 🏳️‍🌈 Theme Song by: Tiffany Topol 🏳️‍🌈 Logo by: Daneen Stevenato 


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Every family has a story, but the paths taken by LGBTQIA+ parents are often uniquely creative, filled with both profound joy and specific hurdles. The Queer Family Podcast-LGBTQ Families & Queer Parenting Stories is a weekly space where those narratives take center stage. Host Jaimie Kelton, a queer mom herself, guides conversations that are as laugh-out-loud funny as they are deeply moving. Each episode features candid interviews with a diverse range of guests, all sharing the intimate details of how they built their families-from adoption and fostering to IVF, surrogacy, and co-parenting. You’ll hear how these families navigate school systems, healthcare, and everyday social situations, tackling challenges with resilience and humor. This podcast digs into the real stuff of queer family life, covering topics across parenting, health, fitness, and sexuality, all through an authentic LGBTQ lens. The goal isn’t just to share stories; it’s to normalize and celebrate the beautiful spectrum of ways to create a home. Tune in for a sense of community, practical insights, and a powerful reminder that family is about love, in all its forms.
Author: Language: en-us Episodes: 50

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